[Alia spends most of the video message skimming and dismissing red windows that continually pop up in the feed. Light's sake she just got the fragging sensor net up and this happens.]
Guys, I'm glad you're making friends with the critters but we have another problem. I'm detecting radiation levels in Haven that weren't here before that boom, and the level's rising. I'm not sure how long we have because this stuff is refusing my attempts to match it to normal emissions types, but... In case you're from a place that doesn't have that sort of thing, it's not something you want to be out in if you happen to be squishy and biological.. or a mech for that matter.
I'm going to try and find somewhere radiation proof where the really vulnerable can sit this out, but I might be a while.
In other news, the perimeter is working just peachy as you can see. I'm still getting incoming bogie contacts.
I think they're getting bigger.
[The video opens up with Alia perched on a roof somewhere, holding up a little sensor kit and grinning.]
Just wanted to let you know that the perimeter is done. If anything with big pointy teeth comes barrelling into town, we should know about it before it reaches the tasty, tasty center of town.
I think I have it calibrated to ignore anyone who's glyphed, but if someone wants to volunteer to set alarms off for a while, I can get that nailed down a bit better.
[It's not perfect, especially considering the parts, but hey it should at least give an idea that something was coming and how big it might be...]
See Alia glaring at what looks like a former tablet computer that has clearly been combined with some kind of frankensteinian holographic interface.
See Alia glaring into the communication device.]
All right. What have you people all gotten into now?
Who's feeling weird, when did it start, and what the frag were you nuts doing before it kicked off?
I'd rather not catch your crazy...
[Why hello yes that is an Alia wearing a face-eating pair of heart-shaped shutter shades and a very glittery pink feather boa. She grins into the video feed.]Greetings, Haven![The feed pans out to take in Knock Out as well, red paintjob shinning red even more than usual for the occasion. He has some v-cards on his hand and a mischievous grin on his face. Alia waves.]Valentine's Day is coming up, and for all the people who will be missing the festivities this year, Knock Out and I have scienced [shut up that is a verb now] a perfect solution for all your romance needs! We have perfected a one hundred and twenty percent accurate matchmaking algorithm, perfect for bringing some interest and excitement into your love life!
Now, if you're not up on your Earth cultural traditions, don't sweat! We have you covered![Knock Out nods and then chimes in.] Now, what’s that entire Valentine’s nonsense about, you might wonder? Valentine’s a human mating festivity that mixes different courting techniques. One of the most common ones is the exchange of little notes with romantics statements.[Knock Out clears his throat and starts to read some of the cards. To help everybody to get into the spirit of valentine day, Alia and Knock Out left one v-card in front of everyone's room door. In fact, just to get into the real spirit of the holiday, all the v-cards conveniently sport the forged signatures of
random people around Haven the best match according to that very scientific matchmaking algorithm. Feel free to find yours and thank them.]Enjoy all that love in the air! 'Cause if you can't get laid on Valentine's Day, the other three hundred and sixty four days aren't looking too good either.
[The manic look of someone very new to Cybertron has faded by the time Alia actually makes her call to the network, but there's still an unmistakable wide-eyed expression to her as the video feed picks up. It's probably not helped by the fact that so many of the inhabitants here so are blasted tall that she's paranoid about being stepped on.]
If there are any Maverick Hunters in the area, please respond. This is Alia. I, ah, could use some company about now.
[She taps the microphone-- decorative, thankfully-- on her headset and sighs.]
Ok, so I'll admit to being new around here. I got the orientation, but... what is there to do around here if you're not fifty feet tall?