re_alignment | [video] And then there's this loser

[Some people, upon discovering they'd been magically uprooted from wherever they were and mysteriously transported to a weird almost-but-not-quite Cybertron against their will, would probably be angry. At the very least they might be annoyed, maybe a little frustrated or panicked. This guy seems to be the exception. He looks a bit puzzled, sure, but he also looks MAYBE a little too calm and cheerful for someone in his position.

Oh, the video's recording! Excellent. He claps his hands together in that 'let's get down to business' sort of way.]

Oookay, from what I understand so far, it's probably safe to assume that you're all pretty used to confused new people popping up from time to time. I think I'm caught up on the basics, so I hope to avoid the whole panicking stage. Actually, everything I've heard so far is pretty fascinating. Just, you know, a little jarring. I have a few theories, but... well, I'll save them for when I have a better idea of what to expect here. The Acolyte I spoke to didn't give me too much information to work with. Well wait... okay, that's not true. I mean, it was pretty informative over all, but there isn't really a whole lot I can do with what they told me other than accept it. I don't like to complain, but it wasn't really all that helpful in a day-to-day life sort of sense.

So! Um. Anyway, my name is Drift. If anyone happens to have any helpful tips for a new arrival, I'd love to hear them. And... I think that's all I've got! Thanks for your time.

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Mm. I guess it depends on your point of view.

Well. I am a little over a year old.

Wait, what.

What?

[Did he say something wrong?]

When you say a year, do you mean like, just a year? As in a year?

I'm a year old.

Huh.

Well! I can see how just a couple months would seem like a long time to you!

[IS THAT SO BAD?]

How old are you?

Me? A few million.

Y....

[WHAT.]

You must have went through a lot of upgrades then.

I've had a few alterations over the years, but nothing too drastic.

What have you been doing for so many years? Do you have an objective?

Well, we were at war for the past four million years. What do you mean by objective?

[Oh right, that war.]

What's your role? Like a medic! Or were you a warrior? [Since he was in a war and all.]

Medic? No, I was a soldier.

[He blinks.]

What was it like? This... war and all.

It was all that I knew for millions of years. It was just always there, and it was something different for everyone involved.

[there's a moment of silence on his end before he finally speaks.]

At least there isn't a war here then. And no you can relax for a little while.

As much as I dislike the idea of being stuck here, being able to meditate without interruption doesn't sound like a bad thing...

Meditate?

What does that do?

Oh, I just find that it helps to clear my aura. Meditation is great for getting your energies aligned.

[and then the hippy bullshit started]

[Woah what. Energies? Aura? His optics widen, and brighten, in pure wonder.]

...Does everyone have an aura?

[oh the fucking floodgates, motherfucker. You've opened them.]

Oh, of course!

How do you know if your... energies are aligned?

Well first you've got to be in tune with your aura. It takes time, but through focusing and calm meditation, you'll be able to sense it and the energies of those around you. You know, I could probably show you a few good relaxation techniques.

(no subject)

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