re_alignment | [Video]

Entry tags:

✘ tf: idw | whirl

[Video]

[The video feed pops on to this:

Around the kitten, you can see the rippling silver folds of...is that a cape? You've seen that before, recently, normally dangling from the spindly shoulders of Haven's favorite helicopter. ~~(Since his competition for that title is basically Airachnid? Whirl wins. By a tiny, tiny bit.)~~ The kitten moves forward, bumping the camera with its nose and then, a voice, familiar enough.]

Graaah This sucks.

((ooc: refers to this ))

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Frag if I know. I don't know how crazy people think.

[...you buy that, right?]

Yeah. You're a real smart one. [Optic roll.]

[Somehow, Perceptor does not believe that the other Perceptor would be classified as "crazy". Traumatized, perhaps, but crazy? Not likely, if only because Perceptor does not want to consider that he might be maladjusted by association.]

[So, in other words, no. No, Perceptor doesn't "buy that".]

Hm. And yet, I was not the one whose comminications device had just been absconded with by a juvenile Felis domestica.

[Perceptor cocks his head and offers a small smile.]

Do you require assistance?

[Figures.]

What? He was bored. [He totally let Splat have it.]

[A hard look at the screen, as he's trying to get a look at Perceptor's hands.] Mmmmaybe.

[Mmmmmm hmmm. Sure he did. And who names a kitten "Splat" anyway?]

Maybe? [Interested scientist is interested! He like helping!] What is it that you require?

[....Whirl does.]

[Whirl gives a crabby sound, and then heaves a small sack labelled 'kitten chow' into view. His claws are good for many things, but not opening one of these.]

This.

[Such an unimaginative name. Not nearly as cool as naming a bonsai morphobot "Lawrence".]

[Perceptor tilts his head and eyes the sack with a thin frown of confusion. Does Whirl wish a comprehensive analysis of the formulated feed to ensure that it is appropriate for the--]

[Oh. Hands. He holds one of his own hands up and looks at it for a moment, before nodding.]

Ah. Eh-heh, yes, of course. If you will share your location, I would be pleased to assist you.

[Oh, the irony... Perceptor's help needed, but not for his brains, but rather, for physical assistance!]

Fraggin' Acolytes and their fraggin' hand discrimination.

[Which is his way of covering him sending coordinates.]

Understood. I shall be there shortly.

[He hopes. Well, there's only so many temples, right? He'll get there eventually.]

Yeah. Bring your hands.

[...shut up. He just has to say something crabby.]

[When Perceptor arrives, he'll find Whirl playing with the kitten, teasing it with his huge claws. Big, terrifying claws, slicing the air above the fuzzy grey head. ]

[As if he could leave them behind. (Captain Obvious strikes again, of course.)]

[That... is a rather... disconcerting sight, actually.]

Ah... hello?

What? [Oh right. You.]

It's over there. I was just going to shoot it open. [But, you know, he's not sure how nutritious kitten chow is after it had been plasma blasted.]

[Whirl doesn't care, but Splat stares at the newcomer with huge blue eyes.]

[Perceptor cannot help but smile at that mental image.]

I am not certain that there would be anything left if you had attempted that course of action.

[His smile deepens as he crouches as low as he can and holds out one hand toward Splat. He'll open the bag in a moment, as soon as he's sure that he won't frighten the little grey puffball by reaching for the bag.]

We have not been formally introduced. You know who I am, obviously. May I inquire as to what your name is?

[If you knew Whirl, you'd know how true it was, too.]

Yeah, well. I am that good.

[But even Whirl recognizes that sometimes 'shoot it to extinction' may not be the right course.]

[Splat wobbles over to the large mech, mostly because of the bag, its little tail straight up behind it like a flag.]

You can call me....~~Tim~~...Awesome.

Indeed.

[Okay, that might have been just a little dry. The utterance, that is. And the quirk-brow-look that Perceptor is favoring ~~Tim~~ Awesome with.]

Hello little one. Is, ah... ahem, Awesome taking good care of you?

[Yes, that was a side-eye at "Awesome" (both word, and mech) as Perceptor gently rubs Splat's head for a moment with one fingertip. Then he takes the bag and carefully tears away one corner and spills a small pile of kibble on the floor for the kitten.]

He will require water to drink, as well. And a small receptacle with a fine gravel substrate to eliminate waste in. [Perceptor looks up from Splat to ~~Whirl~~ Awesome.] Have you any experience with adolescent or adult Felis domestica?

[Whirl is, unfortunately, immune to 'dry'. ]

[Also shame.] Of course I am. [HUFF.]

[Despite all that, believe it or not, Splat appears to be in pretty good shape: fuzzy and clean and healthy, as he makes a beeline for the food. Growing is hungry work!]

Yeah yeah. And I'll take him in for his upgrades. [Because they are just like robots, right? Only cuter.]

[Oh dear. Perceptor resists a facepalm, but only because he made his savings throw. Just barely. It took a natural 20 to pull it off, though. It's... mostly effective?]

Organics such as this young male feline actually manage all of their own, ah, "upgrades", Awesome. [Hey, his name really could be Awesome; Perceptor's a trusting enough sort to believe it. And yay for high-powered optics and scanners that allow Perceptor to gender kittens. Eons old robot, used for sexing felines. What a world, right?]

He will produce his own growth materials internally from the appropriate nutrition and fluid intake provided for his consumption, and undergo an internalized and automated "upgrade" process, allowing him to develop both physically and mentally.

[Perceptor reaches down and absently scritches Splat along his neck and back as the kitten eats. No insult intended to Whirl's ability to care for Splat, however, Perceptor is used to mechs who have never even seen an organic, much less attempted to care for one.]

Are there other felines here on Cybertron? While they are solitary hunters, felines tend to be quite social with their chosen caretakers and, especially at such a young age, other felines, depending on gender and breeding season. This young male will not sexually mature for several more months, at which time, he would ordinarily seek a female, or rather, several females, to mate with, while combating other males for dominance and superiority. I am surprised to see one here; lacking playmates, he will require interactive objects to stimulate his developing cortex while you are not directly supervising him.

[Here, Whirl. Have some Gender Pie to digest.]

So. No jetpack.

[How the frag is he going to teach little Splat the finer points of flying?!]

Of course there are. What? You think I woke up with kitten in my cockpit? [Just because that's where Splat sleeps now is no big deal.]

[Whirl narrows his optic.] I can keep him all sorts of stimulated. [A mech as boredom averse as Whirl has waaaaaays.]

[Facepalm avoidance: fail.]

...no. No jetpack.

[Perceptor sighs and shrugs.]

Given the nature of the Lambda, and recent events, it is not an altogether impossible occurrence. [Right. No big deal at all. Closet softie.]

Within the tolerances of his organic limitations? [Hey, Whirl suggested a jetpack before. Perceptor is suspicious.]

Why not?

[You're just jealous because you don't have a jetpack.]

Yeah, no. I earned this. And if Alpaca Trion says I can do it, I can do it.

Primarily because organics are not designed nor intended to have mechanical components integrated into their systems. Additionally, I doubt that Splat will have the intellect to appropriately utilize a jet pack.

If you can develop a jetpack that can be applied externally with no internal components, and which you control remotely, then it would be feasible.

[He probably should not have given Whirl any more ideas.]

[Perceptor frowns.]

Well, of course? [He tilts his head inquiringly.] I am not attempting to advocate removing Splat. [Especially not if Alpha Trion is behind this.] Merely enumerate potential challenges you will encounter.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

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