re_alignment | [Video] [Transmitting from Prima's Quadrant, outside Police Headquarters]

[The feed clicks on and Wing raises a hand to greet you. He's looking every bit himself again, though his usual cheer is replaced with a determined solemnity. The new Police Headquarters building stands behind him, from which he's obviously just emerged, with the light of Prima's temple shining from the distance.]

Fellow Haveners,

The last time I addressed you all in this fashion I was very much not myself, as many of you already know. Aside from not looking like myself, I was also suffering from a decidedly altered state of mind and morality, through no fault of my own. Unfortunately, I believe many others here may have also suffered because of it.

But first: Any issues you have with words or actions you assume were Drift's during that period, the week before last, know that they were mine instead. Due to Alpha Trion's pages, I looked near identical to Drift while he looked nothing like himself during that time. I do not wish him blamed for my actions or those perpetrated by my dark counterpart. If you have issues, please bring them to me.

[His head hangs in silence, gathering his thoughts. The weight of this is obviously heavy upon him, but he bears it with the quiet, composed grace of someone who has done much introspection. When he speaks, his tone carries both strength and empathy.]

I wish to extend a dutiful and sparkfelt apology for the wrongs incurred due to my words or deeds during that time. I can't tell you how much it pains me that I may have, even unintentionally, undermined your trust in me, damaged friendships or tarnished respect. It would never be my intention to deliberately slander, harm, make uncomfortable or otherwise create malcontent in this community.

[He cycles a ventilation here, slightly uncomfortable. Because though that's 99% true, he's fully aware that part of him bares little shame in his plots to kill Prism. That's something he's still trying to reconcile with his own values.]

As much as self exile is a fitting penance for someone such as I, which is why I have been out of touch of late, I realize it does little for the community which I have wronged. As such I would like to offer recompense to those my dark counterpart called out directly, in the form of one task or favor you wish of me. Such a task can be any of your choosing, so long as it is within my ability, though I do reserve the right to refuse on moral grounds...

If you feel such a thing is not necessary or refuse the offer for any other reason I will respect that, but remember I do this for you as much as myself, as it is part of my personal process of atonement.

Feel free to contact me publicly or privately, however you feel most safe. I urge anyone to please bring me any questions or concerns you have, I will field them all regardless of what you have to say, pleasant or not. I owe you all that much.

I'm sorry it took me this long to bring you apology, but it's taken me some time to get right with myself before being able to offer the same to all of you. You have my endless gratitude for your patience and understanding. By the Guiding Hand, I wish you all well.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[When they last spoke, Blurr had been so distraught, Wing didn't have the spark to make things worse. He's not sure Blurr even remembers their encounter, which might be for the best...]

[...or not.]

Ah, Blurr.... Are you, alright?

[He's still distraught, even more so after this post. Blurr can only remember a few things about what happened and the memories are very confusing.]

NoimnotsureifImokay.....when you was Drift did we mak...meet?

[Oooooh dear. Awkward situation is awkward...]

[He shares some of your distress Blurr, even more so after seeing it. It's pretty plain in the way he holds his frame, the pinions and audial flares tight.]

I, um, Yes. We did...meet.

[The memories, the ones he recalls, come back to him. The memories with strongest emotions felt by his counterpart are the most vivid...and this situation with Blurr was no exception. There's an uncomfortable heat kindled in reaction, one that's unwanted only due to the nature of how it came about. He pushes it down, out of his mind, as best he can.]

Edited (derp, hit submit by accident...) 2012-10-03 15:28 (UTC)

[If it where possible to die from awkwardness someone would be writing and eulogy now.

AJSHjaksjas no no no no why did you have to confirm that...Blurr's engine makes a sounds, short but loud and it's in pain.]

OhprimusImsorryimsorryIdidntmeantocomplicatethigsmorebetweenyouanddrifijsutdontknowwhatwasidoing....

[The verbal deluge takes him off guard, but worse is the frantic, distressed and apologetic tone coming from someone he considers one of the best friends he has here.]

Blurr! Slow down please...

[Wing can't make much out of all that but he doesn't miss Drift's name nor a few of the most important words...]

Start again okay? Deep breaths. The world's not ending. Drift and I are okay. We can all get through this alright? [He was pretty it was going to get more awkward before it became less though...]

[Blurr turns off the feed and it takes him at least 10 minutes to reply. He's trying to calm down and focus, and not embarrassed both of them further.]

I'm sorry.

How can you be okay? I ruined everything.

[He worries the whole 10 minutes. Wing is tempted, more than once, to re-initiate contact himself, but no. He knows Blurr needs to come to him. And he certainly doesn't want to force himself--even if it's just comm interaction--on the other mech.]

[When Wing replies it's audio, because he feels being emotive is important. He sounds shaken, but concerned and imploring all at the same time.]

Blurr. I know you are. Please. You haven't ruined anything yet. [How Wing would tell Drift was another thing entirely.] Listen, you...you weren't the only one involved. I remember enough of it. It's not like you forced it--if anything, I--he--took advantage of you.

[Because it does feel like that. Like maybe he should have fought the control harder. Maybe he could have done something to stop it. Maybe he actually wanted it... And now he sounds more than a little ashamed.]

I'm sorry. I'm sorry it had to be like this. And I'm sorry I didn't say anything before. You were so upset already...

[Being emotive is important but when you are feeling like your life is a train-wreck, like Blurr's is at the moment, it's not a very good idea. That's why he chose text.]

Yet. [He didn't miss the specification. He can't say he remembers much of what happened but he knows he didn't like how things ended. Still, he can't blame Wing.]No, no you...I wanted it. At first at least.

It's fine you don't have to apologize to me. I wasn't being nice to people, so I guess I deserved that. Must be what humans call bad karma.

[Wing just wants to sound sincere, he's pretty sure he can't save face at this point...]

I-- [Blurr was right, he'd said it. He vents a haggard sigh.] I haven't talked to him about it yet. I've been trying to get my head sorted out. But please, don't fret about something that hasn't happened yet okay? It's not entirely your fault.

Blurr... [he sighs again, this is awkward and difficult and there are so many complications...] it wasn't just you. I--he--[We, because Wing can't entirely deny the attraction, but he's not ready for Blurr to know that yet.]--wanted it too. And I do owe you an apology. I'm sorry that he hurt you.

I never would have done something like that if I'd been in my right mind. And Blurr don't say that. No one deserves that kind of treatment. [It turns his tanks just thinking about being the executed of said 'punishment'.]

Edited 2012-10-16 15:49 (UTC)

[Blur doesn't blame you for anything Wing, you shouldn't worry that much.]

...okay. But if Drift gets angry let me know please I will try to talk to him.

[At this point Blurr is just confused about his feelings. A lot of things happened with Wheeljack, Ratchet, Starscream and now Wing. He wants to sort things out and not thi8ng of anybody for some times. He understands that Wings needs this too.] Apology accepted, even if you really didn't had to say it.

I know you wouldn't, Wing. [But he's not saying anything about that last part, because he disagrees.]

[Sames goes for you, Blurr!]

If you think that would help...but I hoping it won't be necessary.

[It's confusing to say the least. He's not sure how to rectify something he feels only partially at fault for. Not to mention, the complications that half imply guilt of a different kind. But even if he's not sure what he should own up to, regardless he regrets the difficulty it's causing.] Thank you Blurr, it feels better to do it than not.

I'm glad. I know you feel badly for all this, but please, be more gentle with yourself.

[Such self sacrificing idiots, those two.]

I hope is not necessary too, I don't want him mad at you.

You are welcome, Wing. [He thinks he understands. Blurr feels the constant need to apologize about what happened, even if he knows that he wasn't in full control of the situation.]

..Gentle with myself?

[Indeed they are.]

Even if he is Blurr, ...I'd hope that our bond is strong enough to withstand something like that. [Wing feels it is, but that doesn't magically make the issue easier to face.]

We both need to forgive ourselves Blurr, or this will stay with us forever... That's not what I want. You're my friend. I don't want our relationship poisoned by something like this. [He sounds quite saddened by this, more so than anything that had originally happened between them.]

You shouldn't punish yourself so hard. Life finds a way to do that even without our help.

[What are we going to do with them? :|]

I wish the same... [Blurr REALLY wants everything to go well.]

I'm sorry Wing I ..need more time...not because of you but to forget myself _{I will try} I promise.

[Therapy maybe? Silly martyr complexes!]

Thank you, and don't worry about it too much okay? I do appreciate how much you care though. [He smiles softly.]

It's okay, I...know. Time heals, take as long as you need. Just keep moving forward okay? No backsliding, okay?

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