[Video | Megatronus' temple]

[packingapunch]

Hello! If you're seeing this, I'm maybe dead. Maybe assimilated. Maybe zombie-assimilated. Like a zomborg.

[The little girl is holding a a camera phone at an odd angle that might have been called the MySpace angle some time before her time. She's staring straight into the camera that is just a little too close and there's some dramatic lighting coming from below her face like she's holding a flashlight under her chin. Which she is. On her head is the most ridiculous hat that looks like a googly-eyed Rocket Raccoon with a tail sticking off the back.]

I've been abducted by alien robots! They're trying to make me into human stew to power their evil oppression machines!

[Someone has obviously seen too many horror movies or something. She's going all Blair Witch with this, though that's too old for her too, so maybe it's Cloverfield of Chronicle. Either way.]

I need a rescue, and fast. Call the Avengers or the X-Men or the Fantastic Four! Or whatever they're calling themselves today... But save me! The future of the planet Earth depends on it!

[She shakes the camera and turns off the light, leaving the screen black for a moment with some hard breathing before it shuts off. Obviously she doesn't realize this was broadcasting live.]

Comments

[headgames]

[Grunt.]

Rather step on you than eat you. Quit your whining, kid.

[Model citizen here, ladies and gentlemen.]

[packingapunch]

[Behold a silenced Molly. She's staring at Slag like he's something amazing and never before seen, and slowly a grin spreads on her face and catches like wildfire.]

Are you my soul dinosaur?! I've been waiting for freaking ever for you to show up!

[Of course her dinosaur would be metal and cooler than Gert's. She was Princess Powerful.]

[headgames]

Soul dinosaur?

[The scrap are you talking about?]

Frag no.

[packingapunch]

Yeah, you know like soul-connected. My friends have this raptor that they're soul-connected too but you're way cooler because obviously I deserve a way cooler soul dinosaur since I'm so awesome. I'm gonna call you Sir Doopington. We'll ride around and beat bad guys together and kick butt!

[headgames]

Pit no, I'm not your "soul dinosaur".

[He doesn't play well with his own kind, he's not going to act any different to some human kid.]

Awesome people don't whine about being eaten, they take down whatever's in their way. And my name's Slag, you call me that Sir Pansy name again and you're going to become well aquatinted with the floor.

[Hi he's Slag and he'll probably teach you all the bad words.]

[packingapunch]

[Silent Molly ends in 3...2...1...]

Oh my GAWSH you really ARE my soul dinosaur because I was totally just thinking that and that's like my life philsofie! We are gonna be best friends and have sleep overs and kick SO much butt! Everyone will fear the name of Slag and Princess Powerful! The epic duo of mutant and robo-saur!

[headgames]

Kid, I'm not your soul dinosaur, I'm not your best friend and we're not having sleep overs. You really want a friend then go bother the wannabe Dinobot, I'm sure he'd love you.

[He on the other hand, is not interested at all. He can barely make friends with his own species, making one with a human isn't going to work out.]

And what kind of scrap-for-brains name is that.

[Princess Powerful. He does not approve.]

[packingapunch]

[You don't know it yet, but you're not going to get rid of this girl so easily.]

Um, hellO! It's my super hero name! I can't just go around giving out my real name to everyone! Secret identity, duh. But... since you're my soul dinobot and all, I guess I can tell you... I'm Molly.

[headgames]

Your super hero name? It's terrible.

[Kid. Kid he told you he is not your soul dinosaur.]

Listen kid, why don't you go find some other humans to help you out.

[packingapunch]

Haters gonna hate.

[Look how many fucks she gives, Sir Doopington. None.]

Who said anything about help? I'm cool on my own. Besides, all the other humans are adults...

[headgames]

[You call him that young lady, and he will start calling you Scraplet. You're as parasitic as one.]

And so are the "robots".

[Or as adult as they can be.]

[packingapunch]

Which is why kids and animals gotta stick together.

[headgames]

I'm not an animal.

[Those are his buttons you're pushing there.]

[packingapunch]

Sorry. Dinobots. The point is we're both different so we need to watch each others' backs.

[headgames]

[Slag transforms, practically scowling at the screen.]

Kid, do yourself a favor and go play with the other humans.

[Molly go to your room.]