re_alignment | [Voice] PSA and a Plan

Entry tags:

✘ dead space | vandal

[Voice] PSA and a Plan

Hey uh guys? Those "explosives" that Prism asshole was talking about?

All a fake. I opened Drift up and took a look and it turned out he was bluffing. I hope that's worth a little peace of mind or... whatever. From what I could see, it's just like a tag. Nothing intrusive. I couldn't remove it, but it's not dangerous.

On that note:

Teddie and I were kind of talking about having a party of sorts. Like kind of a karaoke-movie-drink-yourself-dumb extravaganza. I was thinking maybe when Casa De Vandal is finished I could host it there? I still have to fix everything, but I have most of the equipment.

Thoughts? Ideas? Can I get a 'Hell yeah'?

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...

I... [Oh wow he has no answer to that.] Is... that a real question?

Well, if it's from the era it sounds like, probably around 500 years ago.

I like that old stuff from Earth so...

I guess I'm a bit nerdy that way.

WHOA. ... You're from the future. Wicked.

Nah, I don't think so. You got good taste.

[Albert doesn't seem to happy by the news. Relieved, but not happy.]

I should have known.

Sadistic bastard.

I'm honestly of a mind to just go and dismantle him myself.

If I had any less standards, I'd go along.

Kinda weird to think about being further along than a space robot.

Ah, you're sweet.

Heh, well, there y'go I guess.

Just honest.

It's a rhetorical question. Kind of like saying "yeah, nobody does".

Owch.

Ah... god. Enough of that flattery.

But he's from Earth. Like you.

[SO, you know, homesick or something?]

....just trying to be, you know, open minded. [Sheesh.]

Drift. He's a bear. That's. SO wrong on so many levels. And I'm not from Earth! I've never even been to a planet before this one. I was born on a ship.

That aside, he's a bear. And even if he wasn't he's not my type. And I've talked to him all of once.

I... oh, Drift. You're so fucking silly sometimes I can't handle it.

[Face in hands half-laughing-half-shaking-her-head.]

....

[Okay. Got it. Teddie's a bear. The bear. The bear obsessed with scoring.]

So. What is your type? Other than, uh, not-bear.

[Hey, you brought it up!]

I'm just....trying.

Haha... my type? I don't know. I don't really. Uh. Date much? I mean, I was with maybe like. Two people in high school and one in college. The first guy doesn't really count because we dated all of maybe a week. Jeremy I was with for a year, and Carol I dated all through college until we drifted apart.

[SHRUG.]

It's been probably six or seven years since then. They were all different. I just like people, I guess. It's hard to say if there are any patterns.

[She just realized she probably sounds like a huge loser now.]

Edited 2012-08-23 20:46 (UTC)

Oh. So. You like school people.

[He has discovered your type!]

Maybe one of the First Forged has a school or something and you can, you know, find someone.

[Clearly Drift is better than the wingbear, Vandal.]

[He's also really glad they're not talking about her, you know, poking his exposed spark chamber in public again.]

Haha- no. It was just sort of the only place I ever had to meet people?

Wh... Drift why are you trying to set me up with someone? I don't really. Want to. Do that. You know? Dating is really hard. I mean, you know, doing that. It's stressful when I try too hard to-

Ah. I'm okay on my own.

[HEADING RIGHT DOWN THIS PATHETIC PATH AND NOT LOOKING BACK.]

Okey dokey. Just tell me what you need and I'll see what I can do.

Well. We'll need decorations. And like. Food and stuff for us organic-types.

Oh. [Well...now he feels silly. er.]

I just, you know, Teddie and scoring.

_{Perceptor's nice.}

[Wut, he's being subliminal there.]

I just want you to be happy.

I'm-

Drift. Come on. I really appreciate you trying to help me. But I'm not-

Perceptor? Can a human even... date a robot? Anyways look, that aside. I'm just not fit for...

[Sigh.]

I'm bad at this. I'm happy just hanging out with you, Wing, Percy and Soundwave okay? I'm not good for relationships anymore.

Edited 2012-08-23 21:59 (UTC)

[He shrugs.] I don't know I thought Ratchet, you know, might know.

[Wow this is far too grim. Time to lighten the mood.]

But hey you've already poked at my spark chamber. I think that means we're...uh...something. [Okay that sort of failed. But A for Effort!]

Yyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyeah he offered to councel me in. That. Awkward.

It's like getting the sex-talk from my dad.

[PAUSE.]

Friends with medical benefits.

[Well that was HER attempt at a joke. EVERY-ONE-IN-THE-AWKWARD-TENT...]

Sorry, I don't see killing as the solution.

So, wait. Why are you asking me if it's possible?

[Seriously, Vandal, what is up with that?]

[He starts laughing. Because it is funny. And awkward. And funny some more. Also Drift apparently has an awful sense of humor.]

Let's just, uh, not have a repeat at this party thing you're thinking of.

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