re_alignment | [Video]

[So this entry is tagged 'party progress', but when the video comes on it's very obviously not.

Everyone know that strange "guy" with the modulated voice always wearing the suit? Well, say hello to Vandal. She's not wearing the suit today. No helmet, no ~~courier text~~. Turns out she's just your typical female human. But she's... not looking so good.]

Someone I-

Please. I don't feel right... I ca...

[Behind her, appears to be her little home, partially painted normally, but the paint job trails off into clusters of complex glyphs and symbols. The center looks like two pillars, spiraling up to two points, twisted like a helix.

Vandal is shaking, face coated in a fine layer of sweat.]

I'm turning into one of those things, I need to stop it I need to-

[Her hand is lifted. Sure does look like a normal hand, but she holds it out as though it were some grotesque limb.]

It's starting already! Please god- it won't go away this time! Someone please.

I need to cut it off before it spreads!

[Someone is obviously hallucinating.]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

The party's going to be fine. Vandal's just a little stressed out, there's nothing to worry about.

That is not a little stressed out! A little stressed out is a long day of stock duty. This is just--

Wait, Vandal? Vandal's a robot.

Okay, she's a lot stressed out, but she's got some allies coming to take a bit of the edge off.

[lmao a doubletake] ...Since when?

Don't try to trick me. He's got the bucket head and weirdo voice.

This is a lady. I would know, I'm a lady expert.

Sure you are, killer.

Right. So this is Vandal's... sister? And everything else I said before still goes.

You okay?

No, I'm not okay!! I'm worried sick and I feel like I'm gonna throw up!

...There's no reason to be worried, it's getting taken care of. Promise.

Please don't throw up.

I can't promise that.

What if I bribed you.

!!

[He's listening, do go on.]

How's a free flight and a...a picnic, sound?

[That sounds pretty freakin' good.]

Y-You promise?!

Cross my spark and hope to offline.

[hey he thinks he managed this crisis pretty awesome why isn't anyone lining up to give him his medals.]