re_alignment | VIDEO;

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✘ tf: shattered glass | soundwave (crau)

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[Leaning back, slumped in a chair is Soundwave. He's holding his keytar close, slowly strumming bits of music into it. Yet, none of it is its usual cheer, the upbeat determination that he usually plays.

As he presses the keys, playing the morose tune, the holograms from his keytar form a display of crystal plants attempting to emerge from the floor by his feet. But they gray out, crumble, and turn to ash. Something trying to live, but expiring quickly.]

It doesn't matter. Does it.

I'm just gonna sit here, and listen. All that noise in my head, comin' in. Every beat, every rhythm. In and out. I can't stop that. Each one, new and different. So. Much. Sound.

...

Don't come lookin' for me. I have enough noise.

[ooc: Your character may or may not be inspired... to feel massive discomfort from Soundwave's current music.]

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He asked me about my issue. With Ratchet. I told him, said I could give him that memory.

I think he expected me to die.

But I uploaded it. Everything. He ran away.

What a pal.

[oh.

His spark sinks to somewhere around ground level, metaphorically, though it was already pretty close thanks to the music.]

Neither of you are thinking clearly right now. He's had some kind of break with his impulse control and you're the most depressing person in an eight mile radius. Normally he's got a stickshift up his aft and you're giving whiny mechs patient pep talks.

You do understand that, don't you? That there's something wrong with you, that you need help.

Starscream.

You gotta understand. That there was always something inside. Maybe it just grew. Maybe what was already there is just finally sinking in.

But I know. This isn't how I usually am. But I just...

I'm so tired.

[The music slows to a stop, at least.]

Can you come closer?

I think the feelgood fortune cookie phrase you're searching for is "nobody's perfect". I always hated that, personally, but I think it's important for mechs like you to remember.

[At Can you come closer? his first thought is what for, his second thought is that is a really bad idea, and his third thought is that Decepticons aren't cowards.]

Sure.

[and he walks up to Soundwave, the cessation of that music like complete and sweet relief to his spark.]

I've always known I was gonna be far from that as possible. Far from perfection. Accepting flaws was important when I was made.

[When Starscream gets closer, his mask splits. He leans in closely to him, to his face, so they're inches part.]

Do you want to know? All of my secrets.

[his hands are tight fists, nervous, who knows what Soundwave has going on in his head right now? And grimly aware that, should Soundwave try to choose to, he can probably figure out what's going on inside Starscream's.

He doesn't blink; if anything his optics blaze a little brighter, heaping bravado to the already considerable bravery.

And trust. Despite how stupid it is... he's trusting, just a little.]

...You wouldn't just give them away.

[If there's any indication that he's reaching to read into Starscream's mind, it isn't obvious. He reaches up slowly, maybe due to his tired nature or because Soundwave is not completely lost into whatever this is.

Lightly, he places his hand to the back of Starscream's head, resting his forehead against the Seeker's.]

I didn't before. Not because I didn't trust you. But because I always felt that no one should have to share my burdens. "I am here for them, I am here to keep their spirits up." Throwing them into myself wouldn't help.

But why do I need secrets when we're all going to suffer equally? I should share it. Shouldn't I, friend? It's not as if you don't want to know.

[Starscream meets his optics levelly, the red glow ebbing, easing back, calmer. No initial assault. That's good. He wouldn't want to have to fight Soundwave, for a bevy of reasons.]

What you're describing is a position no mech can fill. Nobody can be there all the time for everyone else, if you never have someone watching your aft, sooner or later you're going to start smelling smoke.

You want to help me.

[The hand moves down to gently hold onto Starscream's chin. Not so firmly that he couldn't pull away if he wanted to, but the grip is there.]

Help look after me. It's so sweet of you.

What do you want, then? If not my secrets.

[his own hands are stroking up Soundwave's arms to his shoulders, trying to work this thing out, gradually feeling his way and growing more confident in his position. It's new, but he can handle it. And the other mech is solid and sure under him.]

Well, I don't know. [casually] If I end up running for office, you could vote for me, that'd be nice. I'm not going to kiss protoforms and most people think I'm worse than Unicron, so I want to get at least one vote that isn't mine.

[and abruptly he shifts his head off to one side, pressing his cheek to Soundwave's, whispering] Let's just stop playing. Tell me what you need, Soundwave. I know you're driving yourself crazy over Vandal, but you're doing everything you can for her.

Well. You've got my vote. Always have.

[The contact... even in the bleariness of it all, he registers it as nice. Soundwave tilts his head slightly, finding himself relaxing.

He hums softly at the cheek pressing against his own. With a turn of his head, he brushes his lips against Starscream's helm.]

Thought I needed to be alone. Suppose I need the opposite of that.

Thanks.

[and then Soundwave's mouth is touching him and he temporarily pauses, sensing a goodly amount of emotional hazard and sudden treacherous ground that wasn't there before.

Kissing. Oh, boy.

Then he casts that thought aside to the review-this-later pile, where so many thoughts are discarded before he can make any use of them, and pulls Soundwave into a hug.

Big guy loves hugs, right. He is always giving them out.]

Why don't you let down your guard a little, and I can lend you some surface confidence. Would that work?

[There's almost a pause of consideration as he feels the sudden embrace. Slowly, Soundwave settles against the Seeker a little, placing his arms around his waist and lightly resting against him.

Despite whatever may be going on in his head, he seems to accept this, too.]

Sounds like a plan.

...Thank you. For coming for me.

[Starscream's assessment: the mech is isolated. And lonely, and depressed, and he doesn't want to put that on anybody, and that kind of vulnerability spreads like a crack in the windshield under stress.]

It's not a problem. Thank you for not trying to offline me, I know it gets tempting.

I don't desire to kill anyone.

[No matter what state he's in, that's true.

He exhales, tilting his head to rest on Starscream's shoulder.]

But I doubt you'll be able to stay with me for very long. Will you? You are a busy mech.

[he genuinely ponders. There's no force in the world that can keep up with Blurr if he doesn't want to be kept up with, and as far as he knows, Vandal is in the Medbay and has at least Fort Max pulling guard duty. Neither of them are sure bets, but both are safe enough to call for the moment.]

I'm here for as long as you need me, Blue.

[he pats Soundwave's back, scritching his fingers up along the smooth metal surface]

We should ...do something, sometime. Something that's not a crisis.

[The answer seems to earn him some relief. Soundwave's arms tighten very briefly around the jet in some strange form of thanks.]

I wonder how long that would last. Hm.

[The scritching on his back -- that's actually. Quite nice.]

I was supposed to sing for you. Wasn't I? Frank Sinatra.

Heh. Well, I don't know exactly what I'm like in your universe, but I'm starting to think I need a new rolemodel, anyway.

[Spoilers he would hate his SG self probably violently.

He smiles a little.]

Yeah? It's not an obligation, if you don't feel up to it.

He is... sweet. Kind. Extremely loyal. He despises being a leader, although he is quite good at it. I do not enjoy violence, but he utter abhors it.

[Yeah, you probably would, Starscream.]

It is not an obligation. Let me go through my data and choose a song.

I will have to let you go.

[Regretfully, but he does release Starscream from their embrace.]

He sounds like--[A TOOL.] ...someone worth following. [feels awful man]

It's okay. I'm not going anywhere, you don't need to chain me to the ground or anything.

...Thank you.

It had not occurred to me. I suppose that I still could do that, but I'm lacking chains.

[That could be a joke. Could be.]

All right. I think it would be best if I sang without my keytar. The holographic imagery is tuned in to my emotions. It would be uncomfortable if I used it.

[As in, he's in a horrible mood and that's why it displayed something so depressing.

Soundwave sits back and considers which song.

Then he begins to sing.]

[Starscream stands rapt, silent, weight balanced on one foot a little more as he listens. It's a glorying sort of song, he likes the subject. A lot. And he is definitely a listens-to-the-lyrics kind of guy, so after Soundwave is midway through, his faceplates are a little hotter... that could be due to the kiss he's still processing, but it's a lot to take in at once. He impulsively bleeds in air from his compressors to cool his turbines, a soft running hum hopefully masked by the voice.

And when he's done, what can the Seeker say?]

...You do a great a cappella.

[Step one? He feels better.]

Hey, thanks Stars! I mean, probably would'a been better with some background music, but I guess that wasn't so bad.

[Step two. He realizes what kind of song he picked.]

Oh. Oh oh, uh! I mean, you know. The song had stuff about-- flying. And that's why I picked it. Really!

[Step three. He sort of kissed Starscream on the helm.]

Oh smelt did I really--

[Final step. He realizes what he did to Blurr. And that occupies him more than anything else.]

No, oh no, Blurr...!

[shoves romance aside in a metaphorical sense to get at the business side of things. If Megatron were here, he'd be proud.

But Megatron is not here and Starscream can no longer catch reflected glory.]

You feeling more lucid, now? Listen, if he ran off, there's not gonna be any catching him. He's twice as fast as I am on his worst day.

No no no, Starscream! I uploaded a memory to him.

[He reaches for his friend's shoulders, grasping them desperately.] Completely everything, like... like he was experiencing it. Everything. How I felt, how--

This is bad! And--

Oh frag, I don't blame 'im if he never forgives me for this. How could I do that to him?

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