2. [VOICE]

[warborn]

So here's a question. We've got the - 'Haven', whatever, the quadrants and temples and whatever inside of it, and other than that we've got the Badlands.

But this is Cybertron, right? That can't be it. So has anyone bothered doing any real exploring? See what's out there?

[there has to be more...right?]

---

PRIVATE; Vandal

Hey.

You still got some of your - what'd you call it, whiskey?...any of that left?

---

PRIVATE; Ultra Magnus

[attached is his 'usual' datalog - the progress report, as it were - but there something else he adds, short and curt;]

Done with Rung.

---

PRIVATE; Whirl [Text]

[he thought a long while before sending this. but. may as well just...do this, himself, before it's brought up anyway.]

Not gonna see Rung anymore.

He'll be safe from me.

Comments

[warborn]

We...went. [a brief pause, and then-] I wasn't there for that long, not before...this place.

[hopefully that's. vague enough.

he just doesn't want to talk about it much okay...]

[lifepersists]

[ First Aid's optics narrow slightly. If that wasn't clue enough that the nurse already knew something, then Max was failing at picking up his super obvious body language. ]

You said you'd be honest with me.

[warborn]

[BUT AAAAAAIIIIIIIID HE DOESN'T WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT. super obvious body language match? he's back to defensive, to tense, looking away with something between a scowl and a grimace]

...hnghn.

[he takes a few steps away, turning his back on the smaller mech. not /leaving/, just...]

...did something...that I'm not exactly proud of, alright?

[lifepersists]

[ That rather intense look of disappointment was now turned on Max's back now at least. ]

Why'd you do it?

[warborn]

[he can still feel it, at least. or imagine it.

how to explain, though? there's a couple false starts, a couple sounds that're the beginning of words he abandons as he gives up on that trek. a couple half-formed gestures with hands, but in the end...]

...I just...I...don't...have a good reason.

[and he drops his hands, exventing heavily.]

I fragged up. There.

[lifepersists]

[ First Aid was hoping that Max had some kind of explanation or excuse. The disappointment he feels surprises even himself. ]

I'd hope that Whirl wasn't telling the full truth.

[ What's he going to do with you? ]

Are you even sorry?

[warborn]

Whirl.

[that's a disgusted sound, and a shake of his head. that fragging mech...he should have died back there, should've been the one to take the shot, not Rung.]

What'd he tell you? I went crazy and started shooting people up? Because that's basically what happened, 'Aid. Complete with a casualty.

[he's not even touching the sorry comment. not right now.]

[lifepersists]

He didn't tell me you shot people.

[ Now some of that disappointment was turning into some mixture of surprise and horror. Not an extreme amount -- First Aid has seen and dealt with a lot -- but he's been finding a lot of mechs he trusted and respected had their own terrible sides lately. ]

He told me you took him and Rung hostage. And Rung was shot because of you.

[warborn]

[well, Max just told it for you. he doesn't respond immediately here, either. but he doesn't take as long to answer as he did before.

he's just...more subdued.]

Nobody had to get hurt. Didn't...didn't want anyone to get hurt.

[except for those who, for brief moments, weren't themselves but another mech entirely...]

[lifepersists]

What did you think was going to happen, Max? Taking people hostage, shooting mechs.

Pretty sure that, you know, leads to people getting hurt.

[ He crosses his arms. ]

[warborn]

If they'd had just listened when I told them to turn back the slagging ship...

[and here comes the anger, Max spinning around and gripping his fists out of frustration]

...then nobody else would have gotten hurt!

[lifepersists]

[ First Aid takes a step back now. If Max wanted, he could pretty much crush him with one hand, something First Aid is pretty aware of. ]

They didn't force you to do that, Max. That's all on you. What would you have done as a warden?

[warborn]

[no slag it's all on him. he knows it. he knows it so very well, and he takes a step forwards to mirror First Aid's retreat.]

What do you think? I'd've locked me up and thrown away the key, and you know what? I'd've let them, at the end!

I'd've let them do anything, if it meant me getting just five minutes with Prowl!

[lifepersists]

[ For being as small as he is, First Aid is taking this in stride. He stares up at Max, shifting just a bit back farther. ]

And what were you going to do with Prowl? You said no one else would get hurt, that you didn't want to hurt anyone... All you've been doing is trying to justify hurting people!

[warborn]

They didn't deserve it! I'll admit that! I did them wrong, alright?! I was wrong!

But Prowl...that slag-sucking, scum-scraping, sparkless spawn of a glitch left us in Garrus to rot for more than three years! And I want to know why!

[lifepersists]

And what would you have done then? Do you honestly think that it would have made you feel any better?

[ First Aid vents hard, all kinds of warnings about Fort Max's current mood popping up in his HUD. He folds his hands into fists, standing his ground for the moment. ]

When you're sitting, rusting in some prison cell, that's all you'd have to think about.

[warborn]

Guess I'll never know, huh? For all I knew, I'd killed Rung as much as if I did it with my own hands - hell, I might have if they hadn't stopped me. Now...it's different. Pit knows I still want to talk with Prowl, but...I get it, all right? I was stupid. I was angry and I couldn't think beyond anything and I get that now, but...

[but it was different there, and he's visibly frustrated because knowing /now/ doesn't change /then/. his fists are trembling like he wants to punch something - or someone - but the only one around is First Aid, and aside from the fact that he'd have to cross those steps he took away (which may have been why he'd taken them), just...]

That what you wanted to talk about? Or you still got some more?

[lifepersists]

[ First Aid's optics dim again. He's unsure how he should feel about everything. It's a bit much to process and his trust in people is running low. He vents again, humming low. ]

I just wanted to know if it was true. I wanted to understand why.

[ He wrings his fingers. ]

I spent a year caring for you. It's not something I can easily forget.

[ No matter how he looks at it, he's responsible for Max being there. ]

[warborn]

...

[slowly, he lowers his hands. they're still fists, and he still wants to hit something, but...]

Yeah, well. Some things you just can't fix.

[lifepersists]

[ First Aid shakes his head. ]

I thought you were better than that. I'd figured... it might have been a mistake.

[warborn]

[...he wants to say something, but just...nothing's coming out. nothing right is coming to mind and yet there's so much in mind, he just...he can't...]

...they didn't deserve it.

[it's...as much as he can admit, right now.

that he did them wrong. but even those words, he can't...]

[lifepersists]

They didn't.

[ When First Aid is disappointed in you, you know you've fucked up. He doesn't really get angry. He doesn't raise his voice. ]

Please have a safe trip, Maximus. I hope you find what you're looking for.

[warborn]

...yeah.

Me too.

[that's...as much a dismissal as he's heard of any. so if First Aid doesn't make to stop him, he'll just be...

making

to go now.]