re_alignment | [Video]

Entry tags:

✘ dead space | vandal

[Video]

[ Hey everyone, it's your favorite token human. She's not donned the suit today, and that's probably because she doesn't look so good. She's been losing weight since her arrival, but now it's really showing. She appears to not have slept in a week. ]

Hey guys. Sorry for kind of going MIA I just... had some shit to take care of.

So look um. A few points of interest here. First-

Does anyone wanna hang out? I mean just like. Drop by. If that's okay. I'm free all day.

And since... until we can find Ratchet, I need someone to teach me the ropes in the whole. Medical. Field. I'm nowhere near good enough to work without supervision.

[ She rakes a few strands of hair out of her eyes.]

On a last note, I know this is a weird question but... has anyone ever fallen out of love with someone? And if so, how did you do it?

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Ah that's okay. You're a big man with big plans, Wing.

[ A chuckle. ]

Oh uhhhhhh.

The romantic. Unrequited. Kind. That needs to not be a thing. That happens. Yeahhhhhhhhhh I mean it's not important or whatever.

Too big I wonder sometimes. But good to have them at least, and the ability to do them.

[Which is true, but a very, very new challenge for him.]

OH, ah... [Does he dare ask why?] Well, I don't know that it's something you have a lot of control over. I think you either settle into ways to love them at arms length or find a way to make that physical distance greater so you can more on. And time changes all things, as always.

But, are you certain it's unrequited?

Yeah, I believe in you, Flutterbutt.

[ Loving nicknames. You have them. ]

Uh.

Yes. Very sure. I guess I don't really have a choice but to just. You know. The arms length thing and hope I get over it.

Anything else would be a dick move.

[Have a stunned face, because that's a new one. But then he chuckles.]

And I believe in you Karrie.

[Loving real names. You have one.]

Well, have you asked them?

[Wait what?] But you don't have a-- [Oh, wow...the translation matrix is doing all kinds of weird things with that phrase.]

Haha, well don't believe too hard, okay?

[ Too many fucking sweet robots what is she gonna do ]

What? No! Haha... no. God no. You don't just ask people that. And I just know, anyways. I mean look at me. Seriously? Seriously. Also there's a billion other things.

Oh uh. It means it would be kind of awful and selfish.

Oh I'll believe as hard as I like. [He's good at that really. And you can't stop them.]

Well okay, have you talked to them about how you feel? Sometimes you just have to put it out there and let them decide. I mean...in a way, not doing so deprives them of the ability to decide for themselves.

[And yes he's seen you Vandal, you're starting to worry him even.]

Are you saying you're somehow undeserving of love or affection? I know someone else who tends to think along the same lines. [He'll have none of it Vandal, look at this disapproving face.]

Awful how?

Well well, sassmaster. I guess I can't stop you.

Uh. Yeah but I don't want to complicate things.

[She kind of gets a weird look.]

Actually I- [Kind of, yes. She's got a pretty bad guilt complex.]

It would just be bad. I can't really.

Tell you. It would just be weird. Selfish and greedy and. Yeah. Awful.

Edited 2012-10-24 06:45 (UTC)

You are free to make attempts, but no, I am quiet devout I assure you.

[He bows over one arm.]

Life is complicated regardless. We can complicate it by inaction same as we can by action. [He shrugs, it's not intended to press.] In the end it's up to you.

But if it's one thing life has seen fit to teach me repeatedly over the past few months, is that life is short and regret can come hard and fast before you can do anything to spite it.

I'm trying to live each day to it's fullest and take every chance I get, because I literally don't know when those chances might run out.

[He sighs. He got a little impassioned there and he feels bad for it now.]

I'm sorry, I didn't mean to press. It's more important that you follow your heart over my words.

It's alright, Wing.

I just. I don't know. It's kind of funny in the ironic not-at-all-funny kind of way?

I guess I kind of tried to do that and I got screwed for it. What I told you about that cult. I thought I was taking charge of my life. Then I got screwed and left for dead and I can never go home again.

I kinda feel like this is- I guess it kinda sucks for me? But if I did just spill my guts I'd end up hurting someone. More than one someone. And that is just-

I can't hurt more people. Thank you, though. I'll think about what you said.

It's uh. I guess it's kinda hard to do the right thing when you're not sure what the right thing is.

[He grows a little solemn.] These are some of the more complicated problems in life: matters of the spark or the heart.

Sadly, every risk offers both reward and regret. I'm sorry that there as been so much of the latter in your life Karrie.

I wish I could do something to ease your pain. [To help you, to keep you healthy and happy.]

[And his voice gets a touch quiet.] I...do know how that feels actually.

Well. S'not like it's your fault. But thanks, anyways.

And you do plenty. Without you and Drift I-

Yeah.

[She scrubs a hand over her ruddy face.]

Really? How so...?

I...know. [Or he hoped, anyway.] But I don't like seeing people I care about in distress. [He shrugs. Sorry Vandal, he's a caretaker type and you're stuck with him.]

Whatever you need Karrie. I want to see you healthy and happy.

[He vents a sigh, he wants advice on this, but he's wondering if asking Vandal would be unkind...]

When you feel like you maybe have a confession to make, but you wonder if it's because the other person really has a right to know or if you're overreacting and just want to absolve your own guilt.

[His conversation with Whirl had have him thinking really hard on the later subject.]

[ She chuckles softly. ] I'll be fine, Wing. I'm hard to kill.

Hmmm. Yeah. I definitely- ahah. I think. I mean. Short of sounding like I can't take my own advice, I think it's best to let them know. You know. If you really care.

I truly hope so. [He's just going to keep worrying about you. Being helpless to do anything makes it worse.]

But...I know it'll be hurtful. And maybe make things difficult for others.

And it's just--it's only half my fault. Or even less than that. But I can't shake the feeling of being responsible. That's my issue right? I should go hurting people just because I can't handle the burden... [Wow this sounding a little too parallel to you problem.]

[He's so tired of the ambiguity of this problem. He groans in frustration and presses a palm to his crest.]

Well, if that person is worth your while, then I'm sure they'll understand and work things through with you, Wing.

[It's kinda weird giving advice to him for a change.]

Have faith.

[Said the faithless.]

[He sighs heavily through his vents...]

So you're saying I should tell him? Even though it probably shouldn't be a big deal... [He knows it would bother Drift...which he realizes now is a big part of why he feels guilty.]

It's normally so much easier for me...

[If he could give you some of his, he would.]

If it's a big deal to you, I think he'll understand, Wing.

I know you can. I believe in you.

I hope so...

[He sighs again.]

I'm sorry I shouldn't burden you with these things.

I know so.

Hey- come on, what kind of friend would I be if you couldn't talk to me? It's not a burden.

Honestly, being able to help is. Kinda fulfilling.

Okay. [He's going to come crying to you if Drift stops talking to him though.]

You just have so many of your own, I should be helping fix them, not adding to them.

I'm glad, I know the feeling. Karrie, if there's anything I can do... please tell me.

[She will accept this responsibility.]

You're not adding to them, and you've done plenty by just. You know. Being there for me. You and Drift? I really ah-

Love you guys.

I will. I promise.

I still try not to, but at least it's give-and-take. We can be there for each other.

You mean a lot to me too Karrie, and I know Drift is very fond of you.

Thanks.

Yeah. No problem, Wing. Lucky as hell to have you two.

Likewise Karrie.

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