re_alignment | [Video] [Transmission from Solian Temple]

Right, so. I hear we have a dance comin' up, and everybody needs formal wear for it. I also know that fabrics don't stand up well to all of us, f'r various reasons.

[Such as being too pointy, like him!]

So, figured I could I could assist with formal wear in some capacity. Been working on a few designs for hats, and if you'd prefer walking canes, just have t'tell me what design you'd like f'r the handle. Or, let me surprise you~

[He shifts the camera to show a pair of hats - one made of dull grey iron with leather cording, run through brushed steel grommets, the other made of copper, with accents made of bronze and thin iron 'feathers'.]

If you've got some other accessory you're in the mood for, or a different hat, let me know, and I'll see what I c'n do to help you out. These're just a sample, after all. Though if you're looking f'r a hat, I'll uh. Need your head size, since we ain't all exactly the same sizes here.

[One size does not fit all on robots.]

[Encrypted to Solus Prime]

Offer extends to you, too. If you'd like something that is.
[Since he doesn't exactly extend offers like this to every demigod he knows.]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

I was a member of the Diplomatic corps.

We ventured into the unknown trying to find alien races that wouldn't either A: shoot us on sight, or B: not give us money to continue the war.

Weird comes with the territory.

Unless you're saying that you've been to more than one inter-dimensional hub?

[If so, he's starting to suspect where those tentacles came from.]

It seemed like a good question. If they aren't prehensile, then you'd have to make a different sort of motion to use them, wheras if they are prehensile, I could be minding my own business talking to you and--boom.

Which seems like it would be useful, the more I think on it.

Diplomats? Well, learn something new every day. I oughta get back in the loop with the timestreams, I'm lackin' data.

This is my third tango in places like this, you might say.

[Ironically, the tentacables were from his own dimension.]

Keh. Maybe I'd do that if I was my Soundwave. I respect folks' processors more than that. And their systems, for that matter.

Though they have been useful, on rare occasions. Not much call for me to pilot anymore, though, so I don't use them much anymore.

What, no diplomats in your universe?

[It had seemed like a good idea to him. He didn't have to fight and die, and when the Decepticons inevitably barged into Phelosian space he was right there to say 'I told you so.']

Third time? Is this a normal thing, or did I get shafted when the special abilities were handed out?

[Oh, hey, Melan has got some nice ribbon. He is totally bringing this.]

Okay, hold on.

First of all...Soundwave? How many times has he...erm. 'Tentacled' you?

And second...you use prehensile data cables to pilot?

[That is either incredibly kinky, or incredibly awesome.]

None left. Not that we needed any; the only alien species we met before we took off from Cybertron was hostile.

[And it colored their relations after, not that it had mattered much to Barricade at the time.]

Trust me, if that's a power, you don't want it. It's completely random, and sometimes you end up surrounded by folks that hate you.

[Awh heck yeah, ribbon.]

Yes, Soundwave. They ain't all created the same. As for how many times... [There's a rough engine-chuffing noise.] About once a week, every week, for a few months.

... And yeah, I pilot with 'em. Being directly connected to the system is a lot more precise and efficient than manipulating toggles.

[And it just felt good, being in all that space and feeling everything.]

Ever go out looking for other ones?

[They seemed sort of hard to avoid, to him.]

There was one time I woke up flying in a ship made out of robots trying to kill me.

It doesn't endear me to the idea.

[Might want to get that special power of yours removed, buddy, it sounds like it sucks.]

You.

Uh.

You live a very interesting life.

Which side were you on again?

[Because that Soundwave part just begs the question.]

We stumbled across a few, but I was stuck on the ship most of the times we did. Then we landed on Earth and the humans spent a lot of time shooting at me.

... Also whoever designed that ship needs to get their processor looked at. That doesn't sound efficient at all.

[Yes, more concerned with efficiency than with murder. Good on you, Barricade.]

I have. And sometimes it's even been the fun kinda interesting.

Formerly Decepticons. Currently neither.

[Because he hates zombies and Soundwaves and a Soundwave trying to control zombies was just right out.
... Though Megatron always made a good case for rejoining.]

Given the fact that it failed at the one task I figure it was designed for?

Yes.

Very inefficient.

[Why build giant robots with swords if they can't even kill anything?]

Oh really?

What swayed you?

[He shouldn't have been surprised. The tentacles were a big giveaway.]

How unfortunate. Well, unfortunate for them anyway. And a waste of soldiers too, probably.

[He doesn't think much of building things that don't work the way they should.]

Mistreatment by my faction. Being saved by those who should've been my enemies when my fellows left me to die.

Seeing a Soundwave try to control an army of the undead didn't exactly help, either.

Unfortunate...

Er. Right. For them. It was a real optic cleanser let me tell you. If every morning started off that way I'd probably need to see a psychiatrist.

[Thankfully, there is Rung.]

I never got the impression that the Decepticons were nice guys, so...

That must have been some mistreatment.

As for the undead--point granted.

I don't know if there's enough psychiatrists in the multiverse to handle that.

[Though Rung seemed like a pretty tough psychiatrist from what he's seen. Who knows?]

I'll admit that I c'n put up with a lot from Decepticons - I've got thick plating in more ways than one...

But sometimes they push just a little too far.

Figured as much. Haven't met a mech yet that actually likes zombies.

[Video] [Transmission from Solian Temple] - Fifth Offense

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