[Video] [TRANSMISSION ORIGINATING FROM: JUNKPILE]

[youhavebeenswindled]

[The feed opens to a cheerful looking Swindle relaxing on a chunk of metal, apparently totally at ease with being transported to another dimension and losing almost everything he owns. Oh yes, it's unfortunate that he's lost all of it, but there's no point in dwelling on it right? Time to move on to new things and adapt to the situation.]

Greetings Autobots, Decepticons alike! The name's Swindle, and I'm here to make you an offer! I am aware that many of you may have lost a weapon or two upon arriving in this marvellous world, and I'm perfectly willing to offer you a replacement weapon... for a price of course. I can also do weapon repairs for anyone who needs them, so I hope I can prove to you my devotion to good customer service in the future.

But this is not just a business call! Since we're all in this together, why don't you tell me a little about yourselves? I love meeting new people, and how often can I say I've met others from a completely different dimension? This goes for you organic types too!

[Besides, it's more beneficial to him to be friendly with everyone than enemies. Now if he had a Megatron to hide behind, things would be totally different.]

Comments

[sparkless]

I thought so. [He would have raised a huge fuss if there hadn't been.]

Any reason you're still hanging out in the scrap heap- or did you not bump into one of the big guys with random magical powers?

[youhavebeenswindled]

You know what they say Starscream! One bot's junk is another bot's treasure. I've already found a bunch of little treasures here, and it's been absolutely fascinating so far.

[He laughs and shrugs.]

Oh, you're talking about Liege and the others? Charming fellows aren't they?

[sparkless]

Right. So, in other words- you've been spending your time rooting around in the garbage like a degenerate. [Smirk]

Charming isn't the word I would use. [The tips of his wings twitch irritably.] And 'Liege'? Are you kidding me? What a pompous name! Mine's even worse.

[youhavebeenswindled]

[Insult him all you want Starscream, you'd be surprised what he's finding here.]

I found him delightful to talk to! We might as well be nice to them, considering that they seem to have quite a bit of power in this place.

[sparkless]

[Just the way Swindle says delightful causes Starscream to make a face. Sometimes he wishes you would stop with the sickly sweet salesman voice.]

Yes... I've noticed that... Very interesting. [The jet glances off camera, contemplating something.]

[youhavebeenswindled]

[Nope, the salesman thing is a part of him Starscream, deal with it.]

Something bothering you Starscream?

[He's sure that a lot of things are bothering the seeker, but Swindle suspects that this is something specific.]

[sparkless]

Bothering me? [He laughs] Not at all... Just noticing how coincidentally close my patron's name is to another certain someone...

[youhavebeenswindled]

Hmm? What's your patron's name?

[Swindle knows that there's more than just Liege, but he realizes that he never got the names of the others... how odd.]

[sparkless]

[Starscream crosses his arms and looks away.]

Megatronus. [Still not adding that 'Prime' part- because that's way too much credit to be giving any one bot.]

[youhavebeenswindled]

Ha, he sure does turn up everywhere doesn't he? Fitting that you would get him as your patron hmm?

[He's going to pay for that remark, he just knows it.]

[sparkless]

Excuse me? Fitting?! Exactly what is so fitting about me being stuck with him? [Now you've done it.]

[youhavebeenswindled]

[That's... it exactly.]

Oh nothing~

By the way, did I ever tell you about the two clones I have?

[sparkless]

Clones? [That effectively derails him.]

You found those two that got launched into a space bridge?

[youhavebeenswindled]

Well no...

I suppose I would have to tell you sooner or later, but I took the liberty of acquiring two new clones. One greedy, and the other is always jealous of... everything. I named them Dirge and Thrust, just because.

[And naturally you have no problems with that, right Starscream? 8D]

[maxicpolarity]

[He feels that little 'ping' across the network from that script he wrote. So. Someone has mentioned him, have they?]

[...]

[...well, this puts him in a fowl mood.]

Is there a problem with my name?

[sparkless]

[Oh wow. You have....horns.]

....Those are good audials you have there.

[Cough] I-it's a little overblown, isn't it? I mean, not nearly as bad as Megatronus Prime. So, there's that.

[maxicpolarity]

[Horns, spikes, and a very icy temper.]

You're using our network. How much of an imbecile do you have to be to think we aren't listening in on it?

[Granted, Liege had better things to do than listen in on it, but. Well. You did say his name. And he had acolytes to listen for him, anyhow.]

...

[Oh Primus you didn't just say that.]

Care to insult my brother's name one more time? [That optic flash is directed at you.]

[youhavebeenswindled]

[Popcorn.gifing here because... well it wasn't him who insulted their overlords. Sorry Starscream, you're on your own.]

[sparkless]

[He sees you sitting there doing nothing Swindle. How much does he have to pay you to get you to make one comment to back him up?]

[Wince] Brother? Oh, how...uhm...wonderful for you. Give him my regards? He's been awfully generous with, you know, living arrangements. And things.

Nice horns by the way.

[maxicpolarity]

Indeed he has.

[Oh, he's watching you. He's watching you, now.]

Which is why angering him might land you a comfortable position in the junk heap.

[And isn't it so nice of him, that he warned you first? There's monsters and stuff out there in the junk heap sometimes. That's where they land when they get through the Lambda, don't you know?]

...

[Wait, he missed that last part.]

...

[Really?]

Nice sycophancy.

[sparkless]

Merely a slip of the tongue. Won't happen again. [Not on an unsecured frequency any way.]

Hmph. Some people just can't take a compliment, I guess.

[maxicpolarity]

[He simply nods. Of course it won't.]

Can you truly compliment someone that you do not know?

[sparkless]

You're right. They're hideous. Happy?

[maxicpolarity]

No.

I'm never happy.

[-.-]

Are you?

[sparkless]

I will be. When I've finally gotten everything I deserve.