001; video.

[stickshiftittotheman]

[The camera cuts in on Mike, hands on the wheel and foot on the gas. It's kind of loud in here, too! Which, if you look at the merrily neon-green holo-speedometer, is because he's coasting along at 250 miles per gatdamn hour.]

Okay, so half an hour into total barren wasteland and the Duke pulling some wacko "Mike Chilton versus Aliens on the Moon" prank is looking way less likely. Which means I ammmmm... on another planet, talking to whoever's on the other end of this Link thing.

Right. I have no idea how I managed to fall through dimensions in the middle of the night. That is... kind of a new one for me. Anybody out there in radioland want to give me some layman's term answers? The welcoming party here was kind of chilly.

I really hope you guys have gas here. Getting Mutt here down the mountain was kinda rough drivi--

[He cuts off mid-sentence, having just blasted the car right over the top of one of the spires of rock jutting out of the ground.]

Comments

[Voice]

[whirlybird_of_prey]

Or you took some really bad hallucinogens. [Whirl has a point.]

Or maybe really good ones.

permavideo;

[stickshiftittotheman]

Nooot really my thing.

'Sides. With some of the stuff that happens to me every week? Me taking drugs is probably less likely than being on another planet.

voice until Whirl gets bored or screws up

[whirlybird_of_prey]

Did I say it was? [Hey, bro, he's not one to judge.] But you live in some super naive place where no one ever gets dosed?

[If so, he wants to move there and mess with everyone.]

Well ain't you special. [Whirl's jealous.]

[stickshiftittotheman]

[Nah, he's just a Disney protagonist.]

Not really. A lot of hazards come with the job, is all.

[whirlybird_of_prey]

[Lucky....]

Yeah? What job is that? And what the frag are you doing to that poor mech?

[stickshiftittotheman]

Uh... I lead a car gang. It's a long story.

-- wait, mech? You mean my car?

[whirlybird_of_prey]

Trust me, you're not going anywhere for a while. You've got time.

[He may try out his evil chortle on you. Muahahaha?]

Frag yeah your 'car'. [He's messing with you, kind of. ] Giving it gasoline? Seriously. That stuff is [Ewwww noise.]

[stickshiftittotheman]

I... didn't know cars had preferences. Let's hear it, what should I be giving her?