re_alignment | [Video][Transmitting from the Junk Pile]

Entry tags:

brave police: j-decker | mccrane

[Video][Transmitting from the Junk Pile]

I might have accidentally started the fireworks early.

[The edges of his plating are singed, and just behind him the very flaming carcass of an automobile is roaring in its death throes.]

Energon, it seems, is not a viable replacement for gasoline. [He is grateful he didn't try consuming it before this test, and even more grateful that he managed to start the vehicle from a distance.]

[Since. Ah. It exploded.]

I don't suppose anyone has any suggestions? Or a way to convert us to a different fuel source?

Or some wash-cloths and soap?

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[You haven't talked to any of the Brave Police, have you Starscream.]

...

[McCrane stares.]

I was made on Earth.

[Nooooope.]

[Silence]

.......

[UPROARIOUS LAUGHTER] YOU HAVE GOT TO BE KIDDING ME! I mean, really? Are you serious? HA! Where's your pull string? Or do they get a big key and wind you up?

[McCrane does not understand what is funny, here.]

[Well, no, that isn't entirely accurate. He understands what you find to be funny, but you're obviously just missing a piece of the picture. Your humans obviously don't build robots like him. Your Earth obviously is not the same.]

I am serious.

I am a member of the Brave Police Force. We are sentient, just as Cybertronians are.

You didn't know before I told you, after all.

Ooo, you think you're hot stuff for being sentient, hm? Excuse me if I'm not impressed.

We're not only sentient, but superior in every way. Design, aesthetics, energy consumption. Just to name a few.

I...

[Hot stuff?]

No, I do not. Sentience has come with its own host of problems which we must work to solve. Your race must have dealt with them before, too.

Anything else depends on perspective.

Except for fuel. [He would grant that much, at least.]

Pffft, like fifty million years ago.

Look, why don't you stay out of the way of us more sophisticated bots, hm?

Or better yet- beg me for protection. [Grin]

Edited 2012-07-05 03:31 (UTC)

[More sophisticated? Stay out of the way? You're treating him like a child!]

...

[Well, in some ways you're right. They are children, in comparison to you Cybertronians. They haven't experienced nearly as much, in any regard. However...]

I prefer being made on Earth. I prefer living on a world that isn't in a constant state of war.

[He pulls out his shotgun, and pumps the barel, once.]

And I can take care of myself.

However, it is kind of you to offer your protection. There are other robots and other people who might need it.

The war would be over by now if I was in charge. [Grump]

[Ouch, did you just insult him with kindness?]

Says the 'bot who just nearly exploded himself. [Frown]

Ha! Smarter ones than you, I'd wager. Well, enjoy starving to death.

Wars are bigger than one person.

[By habit, he checks the catches and the tightness of each movable part, knowing he's going to have to be extra careful with his weaponry now that it can't be easily replaced.]

But I have learned my lesson about energon.

If you see any gasoline, would you let me know?

You'd be surprised. It always seems to hinge on the leaders of either side.

[A fact that he is very jealous of.] Too bad Megatron is too incompetent to finish things.

Sorry, but I'm not feeling very generous anymore.

Edited 2012-07-06 04:21 (UTC)

Who's that?

[He would bet on Megatron being the leader of your war, but he doesn't even know that much.]

You don't have to be generous. I can keep an eye out for something you would like, in return.

Megatron? Why, the esteemed leader of the Decepticons, of course. [Snort]

[Ah, NOW you're speaking his language.] Hn. What I really need is probably beyond your capacity to find.

Although... if you happen to come across a certain data pad with a ton of financial information on it. Well, I wouldn't say no.

And he had no interest in ending your war?

[He's been wanting to know more about this conflict of yours...if only so he knows ways to avoid it, in the future.]

...

[He nods, though. 'Datapad' is understandable enough, even if he isn't sure he'll be able to access it or even activate it. Be prepared to receive a lot of things that are vaguely data-pad shaped later, Starscream.]

Understood.

Are you capable of receiving acts of kindness, if not giving them?

He had plenty of interest in winning it. But not the processor speed, the skill, or the strength!

[Sorry Mccrane, but this is Starscream's favorite subject.]

He was too old-fashioned. He should have stepped aside and let a younger, more vital mech lead us to victory. We were festering under his rule.

[Blink. What kind of question was that?] ...What, are you offering to do stuff for me for free?

If you were having problems with cooperating, I can see why it was taking so long. Did anyone tell him this?

[He is sure there's some solution to your war that doesn't involve. You know. Four million years of fighting.]

[Still, he nods.] If I found the data-pad that you were looking for and also found my gasoline, I would give you the pad. It is not required that you earn it, you know.

Trust me, I was very vocal about the subject.

Well well, that's very selfless of you, now isn't it? I don't plan on stopping you if you want to be pointlessly altruistic.

Maybe it required more than one person to speak up.

[That, or Megatron was a terrible listener.]

Does altruism require a point? [He doesn't understand.] If I have the ability to help someone, I will. Has no one done this for you, before?

Everyone else was too strutless to say anything!

It's going out of your way to help someone for no personal gain. Waste of energy, if you ask me.

[What? Are you seriously asking him that? You're more goody-two-shoes than most of the autobots he's met!]

Why would they?

You were the bravest, then.

[He can respect bravery. Being told that helping was a waste of energy, however, he wasn't so thrilled about. You're talking about his job, there.]

You have heard of 'friends,' yes?

[...! No one...has ever described him that way. Well, except himself.]

Ehr. Yes. Very observant of you to say so.

[Sneer] What use are friends to a decepticon?

We have good and bad qualities, all of us.

[You remind him of the Chieftains, in a way. You almost seem to be having fun, but your outlook is so...selfish. However, your last question is met with a blank stare, because he's taking it seriously.]

...

I don't know. What use aren't they?

[Starscream seems to be a little low on the good qualities, if his clones are any indication.]

I can't afford to be bothered with personal relationships while we are at war! They would just get in the way.

[That, actually, is a pretty good reason. On the other hand, McCrane is so used to friendship being the glue that holds the Brave Police together, that he literally cannot understand.]

Wouldn't war be the best time to have someone to rely on?

How naive! It's the best time to be the leader of an army- not someone's friend.

[How strange.]

You can't do both?

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