[Video] From the Brave Police Hoosegow

[whirlybird_of_prey]

[Those from Earth might be familiar with the old movie cliche of the prisoner rattling his cup back and forth over the bars of his cell.  Whirl somehow also knows this cliche.  And is doing it.]

[Except he's doing it with his face. ]

Nnnnnnngh. So fraggin' bored!!

Someone come kill me or something.

Comments

[whirlybird_of_prey]

...hope that's as uncomfortable a thought for you as it is for me.

[Misery loves company.]

Eh, the usual. Someone's always got a use for me on the outside.

[megaton]

I'm pleased you got what was coming to you.

[He is. It's like his manufacturing day came early this year.]

I can't imagine the Autobots would have cared one iota.

[whirlybird_of_prey]

Yeah, I'm just waiting for you to get what's coming to you.

If I got nearly killed every day for cycles for slapping you around, tell me, what the frag do you deserve?


There's a lot about me you can't imagine.

[megaton]

Nearly killed for Cycles in your jail cell?

Try surviving the arena.

[He growls.] At least my sacrifices were for a cause. Can you say as much?

Can you say that for all of your suffering you've made any difference at all?

[He still remembers Whirl's words in that cell. How worthless he'd been made to feel.]

[whirlybird_of_prey]

Hey, hint. At least in the arena, they let you have a weapon.

Right. You see, that's what makes you dumb. You think because you can slap up some pretty reason that you're better than me. You're not. Wanna know why? Because you let those pretty reasons make you forget that it's all, always, just been about staying alive.

[megaton]

I'll grant you that.

But in jail, there's still a shot both of you could walk out alive.

[He growls.]

And that is not what it is about. The point is to not merely live, but to thrive. I'd have been fighting for you, too, if you'd not been taking advantage of the very system that put us in our place.

[whirlybird_of_prey]

Oh, like being alive is all that awesome.

[Oh please, give Whirl more proof that he's getting under that plating.]

That's how dumb you are. Me, taking advantage of anything.

[megaton]

So you do want to die.

That sounds...anticlimactic.

[He snorts.]

Especially because I expected better from you. Do you just let life throw you from one event to the next?

[whirlybird_of_prey]

You don't know me.

[Don't make him get all chickenhead daytime tv talk show on you.]

You know what's fraggin' funny? [Of course Megatron doesn't. Not really a mech known throughout the galaxy for his sense of humor. So Whirl will just go on and spill it.]

You keep forgetting that I know what happens and you don't. SO, you know, act all judgy and stuff, but let me tell you this: I outlive you.

[megaton]

Does anyone?

[The growl is still present.]

From what I've heard, I vanish. So unless you can produce a body, the very real possibility of my return remains.

[whirlybird_of_prey]

You tryin' to get all philosophical? Because I have to tell you, I have a therapist..

[So there. Yes. Someone does understand him. Can Megatron say as much? Huh? Huh? CAN HE?]

Whatever. All I'm saying is stuff goes on without you and nobody misses you and life is awesome.

[So there.]

[megaton]

...

[Only Whirl could make 'I have a therapist' sound threatening.]

How nice to know that one must be paid to listen to you speak.

I could do it for free, you know.

[Or he could solve the whole speaking thing, forever.]

...

[However, you've got him, there. He can't really refute what you're saying, since he doesn't know.]

[whirlybird_of_prey]

Yeah? Well it's better than what you got. You got anyone whose job it is to listen to you and not fraggin' judge you?

[Suckups totally don't count.]

Yeah, because I'm sure you got nothing better to do than ancient grudges. Seriously.

[megaton]

I have an entire army.

[They have to listen to him. Judging, though...that's harder to tell.]

Nothing says I cannot take a break from these things that are better to do.

[whirlybird_of_prey]

Yeah? They must be like invisible or something. Or really small.

Oh? Didn't know you cared. [If he had a face he'd be making kissy faces.]

[megaton]

Just because you cannot see something doesn't mean that it does not exist.

[He laughs.]

Oh, I do care. That is a mistake you should not make. [Bitterness--it lasts forever!]

But talk is only useful for so long. If I find time in my busy schedule, I will make sure to visit you.

Be ready.

[whirlybird_of_prey]

Ooooh philosophy. Go on and believe in your invisible army or whatever.

[Don't tell Whirl what he should or shouldn't do: dangerous!]

Oh joy. I'll make sure to pencil in the reminiscing time. Gonna call it 'Bitchslap Part Two' for old time's sake.