re_alignment | [Voice]

Entry tags:

✘ dead space | vandal

[Voice]

So guys? Uh. Look. Two out of three of you are aware, but.

I guess while there's not some huge disaster going on we could talk about. Stuff?

I kind of have a thing. For all three of you. Surpriiiiise Percy... And uh. Look I know I kinda flipped out last time, but I'm starting to feel better and I'd like to discuss it.

I kinda got into this thinking all of you were an item, but I realized I was mistaken. That. Still doesn't change the fact that I'm really kind of into you all in a big way.

I just wanna know if I'm barking up the wrong tree or... yeah.

And before any of you say it, I don't wanna 'do better'. Can't change how I feel.

God fucking damn I'm so awkward.

I just wanna talk about it, I'm not saying you have to... do anything or make me happy or whatever, I just.

Haha, I guess I don't know what I want. I just want to get it out there, because it's been the elephant in the room for me for a while, you know?

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[Well that gets a few things out in the open. Well, sort of.]

Vandal. It's good to hear your voice. You know I'm always here for you.

You too, Wing. How are you ah. Feeling?

[He smiles.]

I'm... [All over the place really, but this is Vandal, and she's the last one that needs to deal with the low parts of that "all over".] ...good, actually.

I spent yesterday playing with Four in the Junk Pile.

We were pirates.

I-

Hah. Pirates... that's really cute.

I'm glad you had fun.

Me too. Nice to just...do simple stuff. Not worry about things for once. [Have a day off to...yeah.]

You?

Yeah... feel bad bothering you with this, heh. Sorry. We've all been through a lot recently and-

Ah. Hell. I'm okay. Still recovering. Working on that whole walking bit. Got some snazzy crutches...

And hey. Rocking this eye patch.

It's okay. I know how it goes, with things lingering in your headspace. Questions.

You should be able to ask them freely. [A patient smile.]

Good to know you're healing up. I still have to take you on a real flight.

[He chuckles.] It works on you. Next time you'll definitely have to come out and join us. I even kept the "hat".

Thank you. You're so sweet to me...

I know things haven't been easy. It's okay sometimes to not be okay, Wing.

Heh...

Hey Wing?

Do you think this is wrong of me?

You make it easy.

[Ah, you see right through him Vandal, Wing gives a rueful smile.]

Wrong? No, I don't think so. Bold, aggressive, maybe a little awkward, but as long as you're respectful to all parties...

[He sighs a moment; half tired, half wistful.]

Honestly?

I really appreciate how candid you are.

[Really you have no idea.]

Gahhhh. And you would wonder why I'm crushing on you...

[ She returns that smile, rubbing a hand through her hair. ]

Figured we all have enough secrets around here already. Don't want this to stagnate and become something bad. We all need to support each other. Show we care.

Things aren't gonna get easier. So we may as well have our own haven.

Just. Kinda hoping that would be the kissing, snuggling, maybe more kind of haven...

[He laughs, and it's got a bit more spirit in it this time.]

Maybe not secrets...but things that are hard to share.

[He nods, feeling perhaps a little bit regretful for holding back his own.]

I--yes. A better support system would be lovely. [Because aside from Drift, he's got you. And Kagerou. None of whom he feels like he can lean on that much.] Just...something. Comfortable. Easy. Safe. That says you don't have to endure alone.

[He sighs. Life seldom allows for that.] No, they aren't.

I already gave you my answer, and I sincerely hope for the best with the others. [A slightly downcast look.] I...I'm sorry but I haven't spoken with him yet.

Yeah. And I'd be happy to be there for you. When you're sad. Or when you're happy. Rain or shine, that's what they say, isn't it?

I know you'd be okay with... with things.

And that's okay too. S'not your job to wrangle Drift for me. He's beibg difficult, but he's always like that. Doesn't think he deserves love. I took it personally last time.

But I'm gonna get him this time, Wing. I'm gonna do it. I want this too badly to give up.

[His composed exterior cracks a little and he gives you what looks almost like a teary smile.] I really appreciate that. Really.

Just, let me know what's up. In general, at least. I don't want to, you know, go and...put my foot in it.

No Karrie, I mean--well okay yes, that--but I was also going to ask permission. And. I haven't, yet. I... I've barely spoken with him...

[He frowns and shakes his head, clearly discontent.]

I know. All about that. I take it personally all the time. It's made me say and do some some...wow, really dumb things. But I understand. I don't know what's worse. Being told you're unwanted, or being told you're wanted but unacceptable.

[He holds his hands out, helpless.]

Just don't push so hard he concedes for the sheer sake of it. I--I fear that...constantly.

Oh Wing...

[ She gives him an apologetic smile. ]

Come to me, when you can. Please. I want to see you. We don't have to... just. For the company, okay?

You poor, harried thing.

I'm sorry, to put all this on you. [Another one of those sad smiles.] But happy that you're willing to hear it.

I will. Soon. Having company would be...incredibly nice.

[Technically he's "working" right now, but it's pretty clear from background of the video that he's hiding in the bar's store room instead.]

I understand why he feels that way. It's frustrating as all hell but in the end I can't really blame him. So I just try to make it better a little bit everyday. I'm just not sure if I'm actually the right person anymore... [He sighs.]

I want to talk to him, but I think he needs space right now...

Yeah he just... [ She sighs, her voice a little shaky. ]

Hung up on me for no reason. I don't know what I did. I don't know. I don't want to give up, but I can't really force myself on him.

Maybe I'm really not good enough. I don't know. Jesus.

Sorry... when could I expect you?

[Oh dear.]

Time will tell. Did you try him back? Maybe it was an accident...

[Wishful thinking, perhaps.]

No, please Karrie, not you too. It's fine if things don't work out, if people aren't what the other needs or wants. But it's not about being good enough.

[He hesitates a moment.] I could probably get away. But...

I'm worried about him now. Again. Too much, probably. It's likely why he's been avoiding me...

[He chews his lip, then shakes his head.]

I'm sorry, I love you both. I don't want this to be about choosing sides. But if you need me, I'll come.

I might later... I just. It seemed to be actually going okayish. Aside from the whole. Probable rejection and stuff but.

[ She smiles sadly. ] Sorry. Almost fell into the same routine.

I'm really sorry Wing. This is all my fault. I should've just kept my yap shut. I just...

Things were going better. You do what you need to do, don't worry about me. Try worrying about yourself for a change.

You should. Maybe something else came up. Either way, keep trying, at least to clear things up.

It happens. As long as you're okay with me reminding you. [A weak smile.]

And maybe that's not entirely fair. Maybe I'm the one that's been avoiding him...? [He sighs with a shake of his helm.] I just...I feel like I've taken something from him, his privacy, with this sword bond thing... [He rubs his forecrest.] That's probably a ridiculous way to try and make up for it...

[Another shake of his helm.] Don't, you have questions, and I still don't fault you for posing them even if you don't get the best answers.

[He pauses a moment.] I want to go look for Drift first. Just, make sure he's okay. Then I'll come by, all right?

I will.

And thank you, I prefer that you do. You guys are sometimes the only things that keep me going.

Don't balem yourself, Wing. Too much of that going around.

[ A nod. ]

Do what you need to do, okay? I've got Percy here. I'll be okay.

[He nods.] I'm happy to be able to Karrie. [Sometimes it feels like it's all he can do.]

I--Aaah...ha. Okay. [Except he can't. Because this is his fault in the deepest and most binding of senses. If he'd not failed, if he'd not died...this would never have been an issue and Drift would have his own Great Sword.]

I will, thank you for understanding. ...ah. [Ooohh.] Why don't you ping me later, when you want me to come by? [You know, when it's safe?]

That response didn't inspire confidence, Wing. [ SASSY LOOK. ]

[ Pause... ]

WING! Jesus, we're not- we're not fucking. Christ! I haven't been laid in eight years but I'm not that fast!

I'll try not to think about it, how's that? [Pleading look.]

[Okay, the reaction lifts his spirits a little.]

I should hope not. [ B| ] Not while on the Link with me. [Unless there's participation involved, which at this point would just be...strange.]

But honestly, at this point I think all I'm going to do is bring awkward into that equation. Give it time.

Fine, fine. Good as it gets I guess.

[ Sigh sighs, pinching the bridge of her nose. ]

Sometimes that's just the way things are.

I've given a lot of time. Who knows when the next great tragedy will come and sweep us all, huh? You guys may have time, but I'm already borrowing it.

[A brief conciliatory smile. It doesn't quite stick, but the effort is there.]

Vandal...

[He can relate. "Don't hesitate" is something he's been saying for a while now. Though it does make him realize something, something he thought was doing good at the time, but now feels selfish.]

I understand. But, you can't force it.

[Or you can, and then wonder later...]

[Video]

vandalization - 2013-01-05 00:28 (UTC) - Expand

[Video]

winged_knight - 2013-01-06 02:27 (UTC) - Expand

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