Deadpool (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
holla_atcha_boy) wrote in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
re_alignment2012-10-07 10:01 am
holla_atcha_boy) wrote in re_alignment2012-10-07 10:01 am
Entry tags:
[Video]
[One man, alone, betrayed by the country he loves--]
[Really? You're going to riff off that movie? Auspicious start.]
[Just trying to go with the whole giant robots/destiny gestalt, set a little tone, you know.]
I'd try the whole 'take me to your leader' thing--classic, of course--but just between you, me and this bag of tacos, I'm kind of lacking in that whole 'respect for authority' vital amine.
[ Cute. So you're going to play along like this is real. ]
[Face it, weirder things have happened.]
[...point.]
So. Weaz. If this is all some way to get me back for those Cheetos, haaaaaa buddy, good one.
If you sold me out to Killebrew I will &*^$ing end you.
But here's what's really important. Since I'm here. And you're here. And we're all here, being here.
[It is time for a dramatic pause!]
Anyone wanna show me how to get Skinemax on this thing?
[Really? You're going to riff off that movie? Auspicious start.]
[Just trying to go with the whole giant robots/destiny gestalt, set a little tone, you know.]
I'd try the whole 'take me to your leader' thing--classic, of course--but just between you, me and this bag of tacos, I'm kind of lacking in that whole 'respect for authority' vital amine.
[ Cute. So you're going to play along like this is real. ]
[Face it, weirder things have happened.]
[...point.]
So. Weaz. If this is all some way to get me back for those Cheetos, haaaaaa buddy, good one.
If you sold me out to Killebrew I will &*^$ing end you.
But here's what's really important. Since I'm here. And you're here. And we're all here, being here.
[It is time for a dramatic pause!]
Anyone wanna show me how to get Skinemax on this thing?
[video] ==> action I GUESS?
Two: Everywhere
Three: You can get PAID to punch robots where you're from? Damn was I born in the wrong universe.
Seriously I don't have an actual plan dude, I'm shit at plans. I'm good at punching things though. And driving motorcycles.
Anyway, be there in like. However long it takes to walk there. I miss my bike.
[AND SOMETIME LATER: Hey Deadpool, there's a scruffy guy who looks actually a lot more like James Dean than Chris Pine specifically. He has a bottle of something that looks like it is probably booze.]
ACTION arglebargle html headdesk
You name it, if it sucks, someone runs a request through Hellhouse. And I pick up a paycheck.
[ No plans? Sounds like our kinda guy. Plans are for chumps.]
Gotcha.
[Deadpool is flopped on his back, arms behind his head, staring up at the Lambda thing. Beside him, a bag of tacos. It's a pretty big bag: that healing factor ain't gonna work on salads.]
Well howdy, there, Southern Comfort.
ACTION
Name's Joe. You got a name, or should I just call you dude in the weird spandex gimp suit thing?
ACTION
Miss Jackson if you're nasty.
[ He looks nasty. ]
So. Two men, tacos and booze. And they say this whole alien abduction thing is scary.
[ Unless he's waiting till you sleep before he whips out the Probe. ]
[ Joke's going to be on him. I wore my Hello Kitty underoos. ]
ACTION
Also man you'd think that you'd just get stepped on for being an asshole to 'em but mostly they just splutter and pretend like you didn't get their goat. It's kinda hilarious.
And then tacos and booze happen and you're like okay this is either the lamest alien abduction ever, or the awesomest.
ACTION
Wait.
Wait.
You're implying there's such a thing as a good Spanish soap opera.
[ Too many men crying. Full lip wibble and everything.]
Good to know. [ Perhaps a little too good. There's no way this can end well.]
[ Does it ever?]
In my incredibly humble opinion, it would need a few explosions, some blood, and a Lambchop puppet to be awesome.
ACTION
ACTION
BY GEORGE YOU'RE RIGHT.
ACTION
[pause]
Wait better idea. You said something something people pay you to punch robots. Something.
What if we like. Started a business. Where we got robots to pay us for punching other robots, and also setting them on fire.
[how much whiskey have you had Joe the answer is all of it. all the whiskey.]
ACTION
[ *^#$ no. He'll think I'm a freak. ]
[ ........... ]
We totally should.
[ Even better!
So, you're an entrepreneeeeeeeeeur, I take it?
Because that is a Trump-worthy idea.
ACTION
[pause]
Who's Trump?
ACTION
...except you'll be The Man.
[ CONUNDRUM]
Trump? EPIC combover. Like a *&^% Tribble &*#*ing his head.
Re: ACTION
What's a Tribble? This is all pop culture shit ain't it? Man okay, you gotta realize, I grew up in a place that'd make Orwell proud. I ain't educated in shit that's actually good. We had Mandatory Fun Television Time With Our Glorious Leader.
ACTION
...4chan or something.
[ Not that we know anything about that stuff.]
Tribbles are, I don't know. Some sort of metaphor for the rampant cute-ification of society. Roddenberry was deep like that.
[ Suck it, Whedon.]
Just saying. You missed out. Because TrueBlood? Like porn. But with werewolves.
no subject
no subject
...
in public.
no subject
Dannnng.
no subject
Damn straight. So, bro. How's this freaky nut house work? Who I gotta shank to get respect?
[Also have another taco.]