[Voice]

[vandalization]

So guys? Uh. Look. Two out of three of you are aware, but.

I guess while there's not some huge disaster going on we could talk about. Stuff?

I kind of have a thing. For all three of you. Surpriiiiise Percy... And uh. Look I know I kinda flipped out last time, but I'm starting to feel better and I'd like to discuss it.

I kinda got into this thinking all of you were an item, but I realized I was mistaken. That. Still doesn't change the fact that I'm really kind of into you all in a big way.

I just wanna know if I'm barking up the wrong tree or... yeah.

And before any of you say it, I don't wanna 'do better'. Can't change how I feel.

God fucking damn I'm so awkward.

I just wanna talk about it, I'm not saying you have to... do anything or make me happy or whatever, I just.

Haha, I guess I don't know what I want. I just want to get it out there, because it's been the elephant in the room for me for a while, you know?

Comments

[video]

[vandalization]

Yep.

I'm feeling. [ Screaming internally. ] Better actually. Great. better than great.

So. Do you... I mean is this. Weird for you? That I-

You know...?

[video]

[sword_redemption]

[An audible sigh of relief. He'd dumped so much on her after finding Gasket's limb, when she was injured--it wasn't her job to deal with him when he was upset.]

I'm really glad to hear that.

No. It's not weird. At least, not in a bad way.

[video]

[vandalization]

Yeah? I hope you're feeling okay after the- yeah. You know all the stuff.

Okay. That's. That's good. Good to hear. I uh. Look I'm sorry about last time I kinda. Freaked out. I mean I was just. Worried, you know?

[video]

[sword_redemption]

I'm doing...better, yes. [Mostly because, and he can't put this into words, someone actually cares how he's doing.]

Please don't worry, Karrie. At least not where I'm concerned. [Says the robot who keeps going on suicide missions.]

[video]

[vandalization]

That's really good. You really deserve to catch a break.

I- well. You know me. Can't help it.

I uhm. So like. Do you want to uh.

Date. Me?

[ WOW HOW LAME COULD SHE SOUND? ]

[video]

[sword_redemption]

Probably I don't, really. [Someone gets to play pirate, someone else gets raked over the proverbial coals by his firstforged. c'est la vie.]

I don't know what that means...?

And I don't want to get in your way.

[video]

[vandalization]

Well I think you do. And I'm usually right.

[ She gives him a friendly, challenging look. ]

I- Drift. You're...

Well. So like dating is when. Like. A relationship? With you know. Kissing and romantic. Stuff.

You wouldn't be getting in my way. This isn't a... a thing where I choose one of you. I- you all make me really happy. And you all do it in your own way. You're special. Not something that can be replaced or stood in for. Ever.

I wish you'd realize that. I know it must be-

I guess. I know I'm damaged goods as far as humans go. And I'm a human. But I.

Love. You. And I've spent. A lot of time th-

Thinking about you. And wanting. And. Being terribly awkward. But mostly the first two.

[video]

[sword_redemption]

Oh.

Vandal.

Karrie.

[He frowns, thinking something, his optics fixed somewhere to the side.]

I think it's a good idea you have the others. [You. Not him. He's lost them both, as far as he knows.] Not just me.

[video]

[vandalization]

Drift-

Please. Just. Can we pretend for just one moment that we don't all have terrible inadequacy issues and...

Just. Just tell me without all that. Would you want me? Everything else aside. Just you. Be honest with me. Please. I want you. I know that's a lot to ask. Actually I realize what I'm asking is kind of fucked up on my part but I could.

I could make you happy. If you'd let me...

[ She knows that's a tall order, but she'd fucking try. ]

[video]

[sword_redemption]

Karrie. I can't pretend that. I don't think pretending helps anything. This is what I am and if you have to pretend I'm something else to want to be with me then...

[...there's your answer. And he wishes it were different, wishes he could be what Wing wanted him to be, what Perceptor wanted him to be. He'd failed because he'd pretended.]

It's not about making me happy. It's about what makes you happy.

[video]

[vandalization]

That's not what I mean at all, Drift. You know it. I want you no matter what, but I'm asking what your opinion would be if you didn't believe you don't deserve to be loved, because you do. You can't change that.

Even if you do reject me, that doesn't mean I'd stop loving you. I'd love you still in hell.

I just want to know how you feel about me.

[ Look at her. Stubborn. ]

Nah. Love is about what makes us both happy. It's about just being happy to be together. And when I'm with you? I am. So what about you?

[video]

[sword_redemption]

I've told you how I feel about you.

[He gives an uncomfortable shuffle. ]

I just...[Sigh] I wish I was enough. By myself. For any of you.

[video]

[vandalization]

Yeah but... you know. There's different types of love, Drift. Would you. Want me like that? You know. For kissing and stuff?

Hey, you are. I just. I kinda got myself into a weird situation.

[ Ahh she feels guilty. ]

I want you. Is that... is that so bad?

[video]

[sword_redemption]

Vandal. [He holds his hands out. ] Size.

[He's not really keen on the idea of rolling over and killing her. ]

[He gives a quiet laugh.] I think you should just be me. [You have both of the mechs he cares about. You do a better job of making them happy.]

[video]

[vandalization]

So? I tend to like large men. Er. Bots. I like big bots.

[ And she cannot lie. ]

Nah. I'd rather be with you. Look okay I think you're real cute and just thinking about you gets me all worked up. Just. Please accept that my feelings for you are valid.

'Cause they are.

[video]

[sword_redemption]

[He twitches, getting a comm on another line. And then cuts the feed. ]

[video]

[vandalization]

Drift wait-!

Damn it! I'll fucking crutch my way to you if I have to! You get back here right now, damn it!

DRIFT!

[ Well definitely talking to an empty comm line. She sighs. ]

Fuck.

[video] Several hours later

[vandalization]

[ Several hours later she's calling back, after finding out what even happened, and hopefully given enough time for him to cool off. ]

[Audio] Within a half hour...

[winged_knight]

Drift. [He sounds worried, and a little unsure maybe.] Where are you, can I come see you? Or can we talk?

[Audio]

[sword_redemption]

[Talk? Oh that's the last thing Drift wants to do right now.]

I'm guessing you've heard.

[private, audio] got lis's permission but if not ok will baleet c:

[percept]

That is quite enough.

[ Perceptor's voice is curt, but just barely. It's quite obvious the tone is forced, and underneath it he just sounds tired. ]

At least three separate individuals have, independently, made it quite clear that they deem you 'enough.' If we all deemed you flawed to the point we need to pretend you are something you are absolutely not then I highly doubt any of us would have expressed interest in the first place.

It is, frankly, rather insulting that you interpret our actions toward you as originating from any point other than honest acceptance for who you are.

However, the only thing I could ask you to do is alter this... string of miscommunication. I would have appreciated being made aware of your involvement with Wing at the time of our kiss, rather than to be made to look like a fool.

As an addendum, I believe you owe Karrie the decency of not immediately stonewalling her attempts to express her sincere affections to you.

[ There's a soft, shaky exvent that steals any thunder his previous rant might have had. ]

Please, Drift. Have some faith in us.

[private, audio]

[sword_redemption]

[He can't help the flare of anger. He tries, staring at the feed for a long moment before replying.]

For you, clearly, at least, no. I'm not 'enough'. Because I made you 'look like a fool', you couldn't even bring yourself to care that I died.

Why? Because I was clumsy. Because I thought I could get things across without words. That actions spoke louder and better. We've never been good with words. And I wanted...I wanted it too much to risk messing it up by saying something. I'm sorry. I am.

And you ignored me. Ignored everything, and now you show up and tear into me like I've done something wrong for feeling unworthy when everything you've done, everything Wing's done, has done nothing but tell me that I am.

Make her happy, Perceptor. That's the only thing I dare ask of you. Make her happy because Primus knows I can't with either of you.

[private, audio]

[percept]

[ He bites back a quiet sound at the mention of Drift's death. That he hadn't been able to deal with, hadn't known how to react too. So many deaths over the years, his response has been to shove it down, move on, try and focus on what remained. He hadn't even known where to begin with Drift's return. ]

I left you alone out of respect for Wing. Would you rather I pursue you like some lovesick idiot when you are already involved with another? After I found out, I was embarrassed. I was angry. I felt lead on and stupid. How would you have felt in my position?

Feelings toward Wing and I aside, Karrie is making it abundantly clear that she fragging loves you, you thick-headed--

[ He pauses. Exvents. ]

Wing and Karrie love you. Blame me all you want for how you feel, but at least entertain the notion of accepting their affections for what they are.

[private, audio]

[sword_redemption]

Right. So, polyamory bothered you then, but now it's all right?

You didn't even give me a chance to talk to you afterward. I might have felt the same, but I would have at least confronted you. I would have made sure, even if it hurt, so it didn't fester into...well...this.

Wing. Karrie.

But not you. [Speaking of making sure.]

[private, audio]

[percept]

I have no issues with polygamy so long as all parties are fully aware of the situation. If an involved party becomes uncomfortable with the arrangement, I will respond accordingly.

I desire your affections, Drift, but they are the ones who deserve your attentions at this point.

[ He's failed enough, by now, in numerous fashions. ]