[ Surprise, it's a video feed featuring Hal 'Bohmerbot' Nine-Thousand, his null manner, his creepy voice, and his excellent taste in suits. He appears to be leaning against whatever is supporting the comically cybertronian-sized cot in his quarters while he broadcasts. ]

I wouldn't like to inconvenience anyone with my confusion, so allow me to quickly summarize what I believe has occurred. Somehow we have all ended up on this alien planet. It likely has something to do with the large rip in the fabric of space-time over that ever-growing pile of debris under it. There is no way home and we are now subject to the political machinations of whoever is already settled on this planet.

[ He seems to be scrolling around in the Link as he talks. There's no harm in getting as much information as possible, though he doesn't bother with filtered things. No use finding information if you cannot share it, after all. ]

I imagine that there are a few things I can expect, having gone through something similar. Most of the population has some sort of unsettled feelings about a certain issue. There will be one or two large fights as well as an attempted coup, before everyone eventually realizes that such skirmishes are pointless here and settles down. There are also duplicates of individuals from various universes.

Is that right so far? [ Of course it's right, he's Hal Nine-Thousand and this is unfortunately old hat for him. Also unfortunate is that no one likes a know-it-all. Literally no one.
Then he gets to the most recent post and... um. WELL

Excuse him while he hangs up as fast as he possibly can without seeming startled. ]

((OOC: I can cut the text whatever threads if it annoys anyone, or is a bother to read. Just drop me a line in a PM or in the subject header.))

Don't let her sweet talk you.  She may have a nice set of eight legs, but Airachnid lives only for #1.  She is disloyal, self-obsessed, power hungry, sadistic, evil, without empathy or morals ; and more importantly deadly.  If you're a bot or a con or especially a human, stay the scrap away from her.  Scrap she's done :

1. Betrayed Lord Megatron on multiple occasions
2. Betrayed the Autobots
3. Stolen energon and spare parts
4. Tortured mechs for the fun of it
5. Taken out an entire unit of Autobots on her own
6. Hunted entire species to extinction, causing planetary collapse
7. Stolen ships
8. I'm pretty sure she had something to do with the Barrun Far disaster
9. Disrespected her teammates and superior officers
10. Fostered mutiny
11. Dismembered and killed teammates

If you're thinking "Oh, but I can take care of her, and make a deal, and we can both come out on top." : NOPE.  No, she'll doublecross you before the deal's even done, and leave you under a junk heap missing your t-cog.  She also enjoys torturing squishies.  Also, she can drill through the ground so be careful.  I'm serious, don't help her, she'll just repay you by killing you and stealing all your stuff.

I'm...alive?

Ha ha. That's unexpected. Harpuia? Fafnir? You two alright? I would just hate to be here by myself. How about you, Zero? Are you here or did you manage to escape? I would be terribly upset if you got yourself killed before I could retire you.

Ow...anyone know where a lady can get some repairs around here? My armor is absolutely ruined...and I'm so dusty. I never did get to have that swim in the pool...

Would anyone be so kind as to tell me where I am? Nothing here looks anything like Neo Arcadia.